You fall in love by chance and stay in love by choice. People in every relationship have the chance to grow closer or push further away from each other.
The easiest route to connect with your girlfriend is to figure out the intimate things you’d like to talk about together, the things that have meaning to both of you. Here are a few things to talk about with your girlfriend to make your interconnection stronger.
Things To Talk About With Your Girlfriend
#1 – Discuss Things You Have In Common
When you are drawn to a girl, you most certainly have things in common. The things that made you feel connected at the starting gates are the things that will keep growing stronger until death do you part.
Researchers have discovered, if you have something in common with someone else, you often think of them as being like you in numerous other ways, not only the ways you know you are similar.
This means, when you talk about the things you have in common, your differences won’t be an issue.
Your lower medial prefrontal cortex part of the brain triggers active when you interconnect with someone that has similar interests. This causes you to see these people as you would see yourself, and you won’t be so keen on judging them.
When you talk about what you have in common with your girlfriend, you will push yourselves closer together.
Talk about beliefs, hobbies, and habits, or what you like or dislike.
#2 – Make Sure You Tell Her What You Love About Her
Everyone loves to hear positive thoughts about themselves. If you are serious about talking about things that make her feel good, then you need to tell her straight-up what you like or love about her.
Tell her about what you liked about her the first time you met her. This will make her blush from the inside out. It will also encourage her to tell you what she loves about you. Show her you support her and love her the way she is, and she will be putty in your hands.
#3 – Talk About Religion
This one might be a little deep, but it’s important. If you haven’t discussed this, you need to tap into this topic to connect on a deeper level. This is a personal subject that you don’t talk about with strangers…that says a lot.
You might know the basics, but it’s important to explore further, especially if you have differences.
Hopefully, you are on the same page, but if you aren’t, it’s not the end of the world. Figure out sooner, rather than later, if your religious beliefs line up. If they don’t, you need to move on to bigger and better.
#4 – Ask Your Girl What She Feels Most Grateful For
It doesn’t matter who you are. When you focus on gratitude, you feel much better. You will feel happier and more alive, like you can take on the world.
When you talk to her about what she feels grateful for, you will help her to feel better about herself.
Ask her a specific question about her life or perhaps what she feels grateful for with her family. If she happens to feel bad about something, help her to focus on something that makes her smile. Switch her mindset to the positive, and you will be doing the right thing.
#5 – Discuss An Embarrassing Moment In Life
Once again, this isn’t something you would discuss with a random stranger. This topic of conversation is reserved for people you have in interconnection with, the people that aren’t going to judge you.
This is an excellent question to ask your girlfriend.
#6 – Ask Her About Her Favourite Vacation
When people step away on a vacation, they are getting away from the crazy stress of the everyday. For certain, your girlfriend has a favorite place to go, and when you ask her about it, you are showing her you are interested in what she’s interested in.
As you discuss your favorite vacation destinations, you’re going to gather a lot of information about each other.
#7 – Discuss A Favourite Childhood Memory
There’s no doubt that your childhood is a large part of who you are now. Growing up taught you a lot of life lessons. They taught you how to act and react in the world today, right from wrong.
It’s full of embarrassing moments and life-changing events. Your memories are an intimate part of you and your girlfriend, and the more you release with trust, the better.
You have your favorite memories from childhood that affect you directly today. Ask your girlfriend if she is willing to share hers with you. This will help you gain more insight into her and what she believes in and wants in life.
#8 – Ask Your Girl Who She Looks Up To
If you are seriously looking to see what your girl wants to become, you need to know who she looks up to. No doubt, we look up to the people that inspire us, and when you ask your girlfriend who she looks up to, you will learn about her hopes and dreams.
This will uncover a lot about her.
#9 – Discuss Your Future Together
You might not be ready to talk about kids or marriage, but when you talk to her about what she expects in the future, you can make her feel connected to you for the long run.
Even if you are just talking about what you want to do next week, this will help her realized that you are there for her and you want to play a part in the bigger picture.
No doubt, if you feel connected to each other, there’s no reason you can’t discuss the more serious stuff about kids and perhaps future marriage. Maybe she wants to talk about the house she wants to live in and where she might like to retire.
Bottom line is, this is going to help strengthen your connection, and there’s good in that.
#10 – Talk About Her Old Hobbies
I’m sure hobbies are an important part of her past, not to mention the fact they will suggest where she wants to be in the future.
When you are talking about hobbies, you are talking about a piece of her heart. These are the things she does because she is passionate about them, not because she has to do them.
This is an excellent route to gain insight into who she is and who she wants to become. They may even inspire her to tap back into the things that made her smile in the past.
#11 – Ask Your Girlfriend What Her Definition Of Romance Is
Beyond a shadow of a doubt, this is one of the most critical questions you need to talk to your girlfriend about. Every woman thinks about romance differently. Many women like to be surprised, and others like to be swept off their feet.
When you understand what your girl finds romantic, you will be able to deliver what she needs in your relationship.
Experts tell us, if there is no romance, your relationship can’t flourish. When you aren’t romantic with your partner, there is a disconnect that will push you apart fast.
Romance is about becoming closer with your partner. It’s about showing her how much you love and care about her. This will remind her that there is so much more to your connection than the day to day.
#12 – Ask Her About Her Goals Outside Your Relationship
What’s important to remember is that you are two people in a relationship, but you understand her interests and goals outside the relationship are important. It doesn’t matter whether they are health goals or job goals; you need to validate and respect them.
Your goals might be the total opposite of hers, and that’s okay. This will remind you of why you love this girl so much.
#13 – Discuss Your Favourite Television Shows Or Movies
Everyone has their favorite shows, movies, or television to watch. She will enjoy talking about her favorites, and you need to open your ears to listen to what gets her excited.
When you openly talk about this, it won’t take you long to discover what you have in common.
Better yet, when you figure out you love the same movie or television show, it’s simply amazing.
This will connect you closer because you will have lots to talk about with passion. Talk about an amazing thing to ask your gf.
#14 – Ask Your Girlfriend Who She Doesn’t Want To Be Like In The Future
You’ve already asked her who she looks up to; now you need to ask her the person she doesn’t want to be like. This is a question that will show you her fears and perhaps uncover some childhood experiences that weren’t so positive for her.
It’s natural to want to think about who we don’t want to become if it’s personal.
Often, when a girl tells you who she doesn’t want to become, she is somehow interconnected with that experience.
Ask this question to get a sneak peek into the things that are bugging her. You will learn the hard facts you need to know to decide whether this girl is for you.
#15 – Ask Your Girlfriend When She Feels The Happiest
This question will deliver the insight into your girl that you need. It’s also going to help her learn more about herself.
When you ask her this question, you are tapping into the things that make her feel confident and alive. If she isn’t doing things right now that make her happy, chances are she will change her ways with this question.
Bottom line…This simple question will help you understand her better and make her feel more focused and better about herself.
#16 – Good Sense Of Humour
Does your current conversation make you think about something funny from the past? Talk about it! No doubt your girl is going to look up to you like no other.
#17 – Positive Thinking And Outlook
Does the situation you are in make you think about something positive from the past? Talk to her about it. You don’t know how much it will lighten the mood and bring you closer together.
#18 – Interesting Things During The Day
There’s no doubt this one is pretty simple. Tell her what happened during your day. The more interesting your life, the more there will be to talk about.
#19 – Tell Me How Your Day Is Going
This is another easy one. Ask her how her day went. No doubt, your girlfriend will absolutely love this. This is showing her that you are courteous and attentive. She needs you to listen to her, and that’s a given with this one.
#20 – Her Inner Feelings
It’s important you understand that your emotional health is very important. When you are open and honest with your emotions and feelings, you help stay on track with your girlfriend emotionally. This will strengthen your relationship immensely.
#21 – Pay Attention To Her Emotions
It’s important that you get your girl to talk about how she is feeling. Keep in mind, her thoughts and emotions are important. Make sure you are a part of this if you want to be with her in the future.
#22 – Her Mutual Observations
Chances are you will both be experiencing something at the same time. Make sure you discuss it and figure it out. Give her your opinion and then ask her what she thinks. This is an excellent route to begin a conversation and keep it going.
#23 – Try Television Talk
When you are trying to connect with your girl, one of the easiest routes is to connect with common television shows. Make sure you snuggle up on the couch and watch television together. Talk about magical.
#24 – Attack Conflicts
Whenever you have a disagreement with your girl, you need to deal with the issues, instead of sweeping them under the rug. This is the chance to talk openly with your partner and deal with the challenges in front of you.
It takes a heck of a lot of confidence and self-belief to deal with the wrongs in your life, accept where you screwed up, and move on positively.
Use this opportunity with the one you love to accept and lift each other up, instead of knocking each other down for the count. There is no gain in that.
Here are a few things you should never tell your girlfriend.
So you’ve got the girl. That doesn’t mean the battle is won. There are a few key things you shouldn’t ever discuss with your girlfriend if you want to keep your girl.
Things To Not Discuss With Your Girlfriend
#1 – Yapping At Her Not To Get Emotional
There are a few exceptions; however, girls tend to be the more emotional of the genders. This is just the way women work. You need to let her release her emotional side and not judge her for it.
The absolute worst thing you can do during an emotional situation is to start preaching to her about being emotional. It’s a woman’s right.
#2 – Discussing How Much Money You Really Have
Money is stressful for most people. When it comes to relationships it’s often a deal breaker. If you happen to make more money than your girlfriend does, you definitely don’t want to yap to her about how much money you have and make her feel bad. When it comes to discussing finances, just keep it simple.
She doesn’t need to know what you make, and you don’t need to pressure her in any way about money. That’s a smooth move.
#3 Relating Her Actions To Her Hormones
If you ask or suggest this, you are in big trouble!!
Don’t ever relate her emotions to the time of the month. That’s so freakin’ lame.
You have no idea because the woman’s hormonal cycle does what it wants. You are best to refrain from any comments here.
#4 – Don’t Ask Her About Her Sexual Past
Of course, you are going to think about this, but you need to think clearly before you ask the question. In other words, you need to be prepared for the answer.
We all have a sexual past. Tell me how that helps in the future.
For sure, if you love this girl, this question will make you angry; that’s natural. Just don’t ask, please.
#5 – Commenting On Her Makeup-Free Face
There’s no question that the first few dates are always going to bring out the best in her. What you need to understand is you can’t expect her to look perfect always.
She’s going to show up looking like crap. That’s okay.
Accept this is a perfect part of your relationship.
#6 – Asking For Couple Activities That You Aren’t Going To Be Involved With
If you are going suggest things like dieting or exercising solo, you’re on the wrong track. However, if you can discuss these issues together, that’s a smart move.
#7 – Asking Her About How She Likes To Self-Indulge
It’s important that you don’t push her here. Understanding her pleasures is important, but pushing her too far isn’t a good thing. Open the door to conversation, but don’t make her feel embarrassed.
#8 – Discussing Your Union
So many men have screwed themselves by talking about the mistakes of the past.
They open the door to the past and start talking about the women they shouldn’t have dated. Do yourself a favor and leave the past where it belongs, in the past.
Of course, you need to talk about what you screwed up on, but you also need to talk about what might work.
#9 – Trash-Talking Her Hairstyle Or Clothes
There’s no doubt what a gal is wearing means everything. It really doesn’t matter how beautiful your gal is…if you are dissing her hairstyle or what she is wearing, you are screwed.
It’s important she understands what you are thinking and feeling. However, you need to tell her the truth.
#10 – Trying To Compare Her Will Drive Her Nuts
We all try to compare ourselves to other people.
You are barking up the wrong tree if you start comparing your girlfriend to any other woman. Chances are your girlfriend has some insecurities and she’s likely sensitive about her looks. When you start talking about how beautiful other woman are, you could be making your girlfriend feel jealous or like you are putting her down, even if that isn’t your intention.
When you are looking for things to talk about with your girlfriend, you need to dig far and deep. Often, we like to push past the issues, ignore them, and try to move forward with a positive smile.
That often ends in disaster because, if you don’t deal with it head-on, it will come back to get you in the end.
Use these questions and expert advice to make sure you talk to your girlfriend about the questions you should. You will win in the end.