If you want to attract women, they have to know how great you are, right? But so many guys are scared to tell and show women that they are a great catch for fear of being judged as a jerk. If you are one of them, you need to stop that. You have to show a woman how great you are, and self-promotion will help you do that.
Bragging Will Ruin Your Image With Women
Brag: Say in a boastful manner. Being excessively egotistic about yourself.
Technically it is not the self-promotion that you should be scared of – it is bragging. When you brag about yourself to women, you say things like:
- I’m so sexy
- I come from a long line of hot and healthy men
- I make x-amount of money
- My exes have all told me how great I am in bed
- There is no one who knows how to please a woman like I do
The problem is that these statements (even if they are true) sound obnoxious and snobbish. They make you look egotistic, and women don’t want a man who is egotistic and vain.
Worse, if you brag enough, you start to believe that you are better than other people; in other words, you start to act the part and you start to look down on others. That affects your social skills with everyone around you.
[box]Tweet This: An attractive person focuses on themselves and others, not mostly on themselves.[/box]
I knew a guy who thought he was god’s gift to women. In fact, I think he thought he was god’s gift to the world. He would constantly stroke his ego by talking about how great he was. It turned his friends off, but more importantly it turned women off. The only women he could get were women with very low self-esteem – which is not the type of woman you want! He is still single to this day (he’s pushing forty-something now).
Strong and awesome women don’t like obnoxious men.
Women also don’t like men who obviously put themselves on a pedestal above other people. It is an unattractive quality to have. When you tell a woman that you are ‘the best at’ something, then you are automatically saying, “I’m better than that guy and that guy and probably even you.”
Plus, many people brag because they are insecure, and whether you are insecure or not, some women will see you that way. For instance, bragging about how great you are in bed can be viewed as a cover up for how bad you are. After all, a man with a huge penis doesn’t need to brag about it as it will be very apparent somewhere along the way.
My point is that instead of bragging, you should show women how great you are. Believe me, if you are a great guy who is a great catch and has a lot of great qualities about you, women will intuitively be able to see that in your actions. And, the more you interact with them, the more they will be amazed at the amazing guy you are.
Self-Promotion Will Work Wonders To Attract Women
Self-promotion: The action of promoting or publicizing oneself. In other words, showing other’s that you are a great guy.
Sounds like the same thing as bragging, right? But there is one difference.
Self-promotion should showcase what you can (or could) do for others – or women in this case.
For instance, instead of saying, “I have pleased every woman I have met!” show a woman how understanding and compassionate you are. She will instantly know that you are a guy who understands how to please women.
Sometimes self-promotion can be done without words; however, sometimes you need to talk about your strengths and endearing qualities in order to showcase them. In this case, talk about yourself in a way that shows a woman you have great qualities, but are realistic about them.
For instance, instead of saying, “I make ten thousand dollars a month,” say “I have worked really hard on my business and now enjoy a ten thousand dollar a month paycheck.” This shows that you are aware that the prize came from the effort. And, while it shows a woman you have money and are happy about it, bragging is not part of the equation.
Stop Bragging And Start Attracting Women
Not sure if you are bragging? If you feel like you should start a sentence with, “I don’t mean to brag, but…” then you are bragging. It is unbecoming and will turn off most women who are worthy of your time.
Really, self promotion is simply wording things differently.
It is about painting yourself in an attractive light without making it sound like you think you are god’s gift to her.
It’s about highlighting your strengths that got you to where you are today, and showcasing those strengths when you can.
It is one of those things that will help a woman know exactly what type of guy and what you have to offer her.
maxwell ivey says
Hello; this is an insightful post. i don’t think i put myself out there enough to be bragging or self promoting. I am a almost totally blind gentleman in a city with no mass transit. Not much at least I recently told a friend that I may be hard for some women because its not like I can sincerely tell them how beautiful they are all the time. i am a good listener and don’t feel like i have to solve their problems. and when asked what i’m looking for i say a woman with a sweet voice and an even temper. so if you know any ladies out there who might be interested in a tall blind gentleman who used to travel with a carnival and now makes his living selling rides an doter amusement equipment online, please send them my email. smile at least the post got me thinking. thanks and take care, max
Bellaisa says
Hey Max, nice to see you off Twitter!
It sounds like you have an awful lot to offer a woman, and a woman with a sweet voice and even temper should not be that hard to find!
Not a bragger OR a self-promoter eh? I think it’s important to show women (and men) that you are a man who has a lot to offer this world! People need to know that!
maxwell ivey says
hi; after reading your reply, i realized that i am a blatant self promoter when it comes to my business, website, blog, and now videos. I just haven’t thought of approaching meeting women in the same way. Kind of funny when you think that my twitter comment when i tweeted your post mentioned applying these methods to business gatherings and networking opportunities. so, like anything else i just have to take what i know and apply it to other areas of my life. I mean for my business i have a form letter and everything telling people why they should use my site. smile okay, i want a woman with a sweet voice even temper valid license and an adventurous spirit because someday soon i will be setting off to travel the world for my business. i have offers from friends and clients and just need to find out how to get there. that is how to pay for it smile. by the way I’v been kicking an idea around in my mind and would like your opinion and that of the readers. I wonder if I could announce that i will be visiting a given city or town and ask the local chamber of commerce college or university and of course the owners of the equipment to arrange for my transportation and the use of someone to run the camera and edit the video. I mention it because i don’t want not having that traveling companion to keep me from following my dream and also because i wonder if that special woman might be out there just waiting for me to visit her neck of the woods. thanks for the eye opener or ear opener that is. take care, max
Bellaisa says
I find that when we have thoughts or ideas, it is usually our intuition calling us to do something, and acting on those thoughts and ideas almost always works out well. So, if you have an urge to try something, it is because your inner being knows that it could work out (or that a woman is waiting for you there!) Follow your intuition!