Gratitude has been proven to have a ton of benefits, including improving mental health, physical health, and opening the door to more relationships. In fact, studies have shown that showing gratitude towards others (which naturally happens when you feel grateful) makes them more likely to pursue a relationship with you. So, if you want to win over a woman, then a trait that may make you more appealing is gratitude. But, what if you don’t feel grateful? What if you feel like your life is a complete mess, nothing works out, and nothing will ever work out? Can you ever be grateful? Yes, you can.
When you don’t feel grateful, you are focused on something negative – and there is always something positive that you are overlooking. I’ve seen this time and time again. Two people can be in the exact same situation and one can feel gratitude while the other feels unhappy. So how do you become the grateful person instead of the unhappy person?
Brules – One Enemy Of Gratitude
One of the problems that stands in the way of gratitude is ‘brules’. Vishen Lakhiani, founder of MindValley, says that brules are simply bullshit rules. They are the false observations of the world and are NOT true for everyone.
For instance, a brule that I hear a lot on this blog is that being single sucks. But that’s not a rule of life. Being single sucks for some people, but not everyone. Some people really enjoy and appreciate being single. So, if you believe that being single sucks, it’s not an absolute truth of life… it’s a truth that YOU believe, and it is holding you back from being happy. It’s holding you back from being grateful for where you are because you are so focused on getting out of the ‘single’ state and getting into a state where you actually can be grateful.
The great thing about brules is that they can disappear easily when you change your perception. Sometimes this can happen just by reading a story or article on something and seeing things in a new light. Sometimes this can happen from an experience that causes you to see things differently. Point is, brules can be broken.
So, if you want to be more grateful in life, take a look at your brules and try to overcome them. I’ve done it and it’s completely changed the way I see things in life.
Following is a video about Brules from Vishen that you may want to watch.
Start Small When You Can’t Seem To Find Something To Be Grateful For
I’ve found that gratitude has a snowball effect. You can start with something small and focus on it, and soon you will find that you will start to see more and more things to be grateful for.
How small? As small as you want as long as you feel appreciation.
So, what do you appreciate?
A certain show?
A video game?
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The sound of something?
The smell of something?
There are a million little things that you can be grateful for. All you need to do is start looking for them and acknowledging them when you find them.
And, that’s the key… keep up the practice of looking for and acknowledging things that you are grateful for. Don’t just do it right now and then forget about it. Make it a daily habit.
I guarantee that if you focus on something you are grateful for – or a few things that you are grateful for on a daily basis, you will find more and more to be grateful for. That’s what I did, and now I appreciate almost everything that comes into my life. Even bad things are something to be grateful for because they usually teach me more about who I am (and what I may need to change) and what I’m doing in this world.
The point is, just start looking.
Stop saying that there is nothing to be grateful for because it stops you from looking. Instead, acknowledge there are little things that you do appreciate – however small they are.