Many men and women feel as though they can’t be happy without someone else in their lives. I used to be like this. In fact, one time I was so miserable that I actually called up an ex (who was a huge douche bag) just so I would ‘be happy’.
I now know that happiness doesn’t come because someone else is in your life. If that were the case, then every guy you know who is dating someone or married would be happy.
Is every guy you know in a relationship happy?
Not likely.
Happiness doesn’t come from a woman. Happiness comes from yourself. A woman can complement your happiness, but she can’t make you happy.
How To Be Happy Without A Woman
1. Stop Focusing On Not Having A Woman!
The more you focus on the fact that you do not have a woman in your life, the more sad you will be about it. Most men will not jump for joy knowing that they do not have someone to cuddle with, share life with, and have sex with. (Some men may, but most men won’t.)
If you put your focus on the fact that you are lacking something, you will, without a doubt, feel as though you are lacking something. And when you feel as though you are lacking something, you will NOT be happy.
Start talking to yourself differently and put your focus on what you do have and how it adds value to your life. For instance:
- I have a home that keeps me warm at night
- I have a car that gets me where I want to go
- I have a bus pass that helps me save the environment and get to where I want to go
- I have friends to laugh with and support me
- I have family who loves me unconditionally
It’s okay to desire a dream woman in your life, just don’t make the lack of a woman in your life become your focus.
2. Work On Growth In Yourself
I am a HUGE advocate for continuous personal growth. Why? Because it makes you happier.
The more you learn about yourself, the more confident and comfortable you will be in your own skin.
The more you learn about yourself, the more you will give off a sense of confidence that attracts women.
In short, growing every single day makes you happier and makes you a catch, and it will take your attention away from the thought ‘I can’t be happy without a woman!’ Instead, you will naturally feel happy every day.
Here’s my simple, simple suggestion:
- Write down some areas of your life that you would like to grow in. For instance, if you want to learn more about women, then write that down.
- Start working on those areas that you want to grow in. Answer those questions. Fill in the blanks. Expand your mind. Discover what you enjoy and what you hate. Become the YOU that makes you happy, fulfilled, and excited to get out of bed in the morning.
If you do that, you will not have time to focus on not having a woman in your life.
3. Remember You Are Not Going To Be Permanently Without A Woman
Just because you are without a woman now (or up until now) it doesn’t mean that you will permanently not have a woman in your life. It just means you haven’t found the right one or developed the right skills to attract women and keep them.
There is a woman out there for you, I guarantee it. Once you remove your focus off your lack of women, and start focusing on your life and your happiness, your desire for a woman will naturally help you attract one into your life and you will know it when the time comes.
Pelangsing badan says
that happiness comes from within, not dependent someone. keep trying, one day there will be that we understand. thaks bellaisa for sharing
Peninggi Badan says
awesome, thank you for the information bellaisa. sometimes the men are women are important factors in determining happiness. this is reasonable, because basically man can not live alone. but that does not mean when it alone can not be happy. all this just how we react
frank joseph says
Thank you Bellaisa for this information and i love how you write so simple and anyone reading your blog will get answers.
“Happiness comes from yourself” a lot of people assume that women or people can make them happy.
Bellaisa says
Thanks for the comment Frank. I’m hoping that anyone reading this will understand that very simple truth.
SP3 says
Happiness comes from excluding lying cheating thieving over-entitled over-privileged violent unaccountable and utterly despicable scumbags. That is most men and all women.
Syed says
Right
terry says
ive hear this over and over that happiness comes from within but having someone to share can make things come full circle. for me is now the first day of the 35 year journey to find peace. i hope you guys are right because if not i may be in trouble.
SP3 says
You do not “share” with a woman. You give stuff away and it never ends. Until you get out. I hope you did.
Cosmo Archibald Topper says
When a man hears a woman say, “What’s mine is mine and what’s yours is mine also!”, don’t scoff. They really DO think this way AWALT! IF you doubt me, just get married and remember what I’ve said in divorce court.
ray del mondo says
You don’t need women. Become a MGTOW and start living the time of your life.
BestHonestAnswerOfAll says
How can many of us good men be happy without a woman when even God said that it is Not good for man to be alone? It is normal for a straight man like me that is very much hoping to meet a Good woman to settle down with since sharing my life with with the opposite sex makes sense. Doesn’t it? I certainly would say so, which i am very sure many other men will agree with me as well. Life sucks as it is, but why live it alone? It is very sad now that there are so many Gay women today more than ever which really makes it hard for us Straight Good men looking for love now, and i have met many very Nasty women in my life that like to Curse at us men when we will try to start a normal conversation with the one that i would’ve really wanted to meet which i had other friends of mine that had this happened to them as well. Doesn’t make any sense at all for a woman to act this way with us men which i think that at one time they were in a very abusive relationship with a man that treated them very badly. There are many of us Good men out there that do know how to treat a woman very well and with Respect too. It is a real shame that many of us men that are still single just Can’t connect with a good one today. Well Not everyone would want to be without a woman since Life would be very Boring for me since like i have just mentioned that sharing my life with a woman would make sense. Our family members were very extremely fortunate finding love with one another since those days were certainly so much Easier for them which today many of our family members are still together today as i speak.
TheManHimself says
Good Job. Very well worded. Men need women. Plain and simple. You can’t deny it. One without the other is just not right.
Ricardo Murillo says
What makes you think women want to be treated well? They want to feel good and protected and bein treated well can always be sacrificed.
CORNEL ALDULPHUS says
Daddy Sir, any of us can be happy without a woman,; women were created to complement not complete pardon me please.the man had all he wanted and needed for life but needed to share to multiply to apply to appreciate to be with a soul so he can keep his purse safe and cool.
I say yes you can be very very happy without a woman.with all due respect
Vincent says
Thanks a lot. This article is an eye opener.
Ricardo Murillo says
The only problem is that sex drive can be involuntary and more powerfulthan you think . You have to catch and tell yourself she is worth moderate attention. Not easy given that most men have to face this alone.
joe root says
Could you write about “how to live without woman permanently”?
CORNEL ALDULPHUS says
Joe you don’t need to read about that what you need to do is start deciding you want to be away from them, take your family as if they are your world your sisters and mum as the only allowed ladies in your head.
There is likelyhood that you may, get sex outside when the conji is bad on you or when you feel you have gotten the world at your finger tips(wrong)
Do well to give yourself wholely to God and do his will like PAUL, be a master at what you are doing Paul was a doctor and a LAWYER full with knowledge powerfully.do your own chart your course and follow it FOLLOW CONTINUESLY UNTIL SUCCESS (FOCUS)
mehn am do done right now
One last thing sir, search tour heart if its by experience; I mean if babes have done you wrong and you want to get back this way think again, but if you are clean and you wan to live cool.stay away from the (vaginas of singles if you need one get a wife, ans stay away from men Ass it is equal to a course from the mighty God.cheers)
JesusSavesatTarget says
Joe go to https://www.reddit.com/r/MGTOW/ or http://www.mgtow.com for what you seek.
CORNEL ALDULPHUS says
If a man does not grow to a point in life when his life is not tied to someone or people then he is not going somewhere and in the real sense I don’t think he is a leader.there is time for evertythin k must say, somehow we a have gotten our share of what the ladies do to us one way or the other, I think this generation should produce more business executives men with anger for poverty and liberating the poor from their shock.I think this is a good way to start thinking away.Girl is good but be ambitious for now look away gosh I wan to hate ladies now really.
tom says
There is a woman out there for me, you guarantee it?!!! I was told that when I was about 20, and now I’m 55 and still haven’t got one so guarantees aren’t worth pigs piss.The only good move I’ve made in my life was living and working in Thailand and Cambodia for several years in my 30’s—– there you can buy all the sex you want, without paying a small fortune, and the service is rendered BEFORE the payment is made—– that way the customer is much in control of the situation, not like here in Australia where it’s the other way around, and the woman is the boss. You guarantee I’ll get a woman? Yes, story of my life, people making promises they never keep. Sorry, I don’t believe you. I often wonder if there are other men in the same situation as me—— haven’t really seen any so far.
Eddie Suave says
Tom,
I’m interested in knowing what effort you’ve made exactly to achieve the success you want with women. While, the author’s premise appears to say that there is a woman out there for you – there likely is (IF you put in the work to attract her)… But what ARE you doing today, now in the present to attract her in your life? Sitting around grumbling about your lack of success with women is not going to bring you the positive results you want. Feel free to shoot me an email – and we can discuss your situation further.
Eddie Suave
Cosmo Archibald Topper says
He told you, Eddie. He lived in Thailand and bought s*x. It’s a far more honest arrangement than having a woman tell you lots of lies about how good in bed she will be after you marry her. She has no intention of living up to that, nor most of the rest of the promises she might have made to get him to propose. She will, however, take all she can when she divorces him.
Mike says
I agree completely with Tom! I’m 70 and have not been able to secure a girlfriend or even regular sex with a girl for the last 20 years. Prior to that I was married until she left, and then I had a girlfriend for a short time until she left too. Since then it’s been blowing in the wind, working hard to earn a million that I have no idea how to spend, learning all the skills I can to pick up women, and occasionally treating myself to a massage parlor experience. Never ever for the last 20 years have I had the joy of regular sex and sleeping every night with any woman. Yes, I’ve learned many skills, built many things, and acquired several degrees, and none of those things seems to make me the least bit attractive to females. Yes, they want to be my friend, but they don’t want to get intimate in any way. I’m at wits end and approaching (sexual) life’s end. Why do people always promise that I’ll get someone that regardless of effort, never appears, no matter where I seek?
Cosmo Archibald Topper says
It’s easy, Mike. They lie to you as a means to lie to themselves, because they are afraid that the alternative is really the true – as you have discovered.
Fred Llama says
In todays society, forget relationships. Even mere contact with any woman can land a guy in jail and most certainly broke regardless of good or bad.
Concentrate on friends for they will satisfy most of a guys physical and emotional needs.
And for those….times, use the old standby and think of what women used to be like when they were still desirable
Those 20 minutes will save you a lifetime of misery later on.
SP3 says
Wow, some men still believe this?
Ok let me help: if you are with a woman you will spend your entire resources trying to make her happy. Being in a relationship with a woman is a living death.
Happiness is only possible without a woman.
K E says
Western women hate men anyway , men are , at best , just mere utilities to a woman …they bring nothing to the table themselves anyway.
Indranil Ganguly says
Our Indian women are way bad compare with western women. My Bro, in India too, they dated with bad boys, then want to settle with nice rich simple boy (beta male). After few years of marriage they loot 50-60% of her husband’s wealth. Again move to her ex, enjoy life, it’s a business. In many times they murder her husband with her ex or thru professional contract killer. Very ordinary looking girl/women want handsome model looks rich boy with lifestyle like Bill Gates. 99.99% of them are whore and gold digger.
Successful men remain single and only single men become successful. very hard to get a good Indian girl nowadays
21st century women generally hate men far more than men hate them. Just look at the high number of divorce cases initiated by women (usually for no particular fault of the man).
Women don’t love the person, they love the resources. Women love opportunistically, like a parasite seeking a host.
Kafeel says
Nice information
ENAH says
WHEN I USE TO CATCH MY FUN,I CHANGE WOMEN AS THOUGH I UNDERSTAND THEM, HOW?
WHEN I MET WITH ONE, I REALIZED IT HAS TO BE THE OTHER ONE: NOT KNOWING I WAS HAPPILLY GETTING DOWN ON MY SCRATCH.
THE TRUTH OF THE MATTER WAS I NEVER FOCUSED. THINKING WHEN I WIFE ONE,THAT’D BE THE END OF ALL MY UNSERIOUSNESS IN MY LIFE AND I’L STIL GET EVEN MORE OF HAPPINESS.
THAT WAS WERE I GOT IT WRONG. THIS IS TRUE HAPPINESS, WHEN YOU FREQUENTLY MAKE A CHANGE OF IMPROVEMENT IN YOUR LIFE. BY DOING SO, YOU HAVE TO BE FOCUS,BEING FOCUS IS NOT HAVING ANYTHING BOTHERING YOU [WOMAN].INSTEAD HAVING THE THOUGHT THAT MOTIVATES YOU [HUSTLE]. THANK YOU I’M ENAH BY NAME, A NIGERIAN.(+2348166335859)
Fern says
for those who are Veterans. well, it’s simple put, a Woman doesn’t want or need a Man who has PTSD. I’m a Veteran so take it from Me. I’ve been on soooo many dates with soooo many women that it all ends the same. I always wait until the third date to let My date know that I’m a Veteran and I have PTSD. the next day, every single excuse: “I’m sorry but this is not going to work out between us.” so don’t say that there’s someone for everyone, You just haven’t found the right one, or this a good one, You just have to be patient You will find Her. all of that is plain psychological operation suggestive thinking. I’m screwed because I’m a Veteran and so I’m screwed because of the PTSD.
Cosmo Archibald Topper says
As a Taxpayer First Class, I’m really sorry for you. I hate how my country sends men (and now also women) to fight ridiculous wars where the nation has no business being and then abandon all of you when you return, especially if you were injured. The attitude seems to be: If you aren’t toting a weapon and killing or being killed, then you get nothing – because what have you done for Uncle Scam lately?
I wish you a better life in the future.
pessimist says
Anyone who thinks life with a woman is a good thing should talk with as many married men as possible. It isn’t a coincidence that 70% of American marriages end in divorce. Millennials in many nations have decided marriage isn’t worth the cost. I suspect that may be due to growing up watching their parents do battle over every little detail of their shared existence.
So if you need sex, hire a professional. It will cost you as much as a wife for a month and the sex will be ever so much better.
Indranil Ganguly says
Agreed. But you’ll not get same emotion with escort girl compare with your emotional partner like your gf or wife (unless you hire a cinema artist/serial artist/corporate girl).
Yes, I know, good trusted faithful loyal wife/gf is unicorn.
Cosmo Archibald Topper says
You get plenty of emotion from a woman who thinks she owns you, Indranil Ganguly. Just disappoint her one time, and you will wish you had hired a professional sex worker and paid her to go home afterward.
Nat says
The happiest I’ve been was when we stopped having intimacy, sleeping together, communication, and not living under the same roof, and another biggie is not having any rug rats. Married 50 years and its been almost 40 years so far great life for me. I have no cares nor any worries. just go about my business with out any whining, orders being fired at me and stupid questions.
Rehan Bashir says
this is after a try over writing about woman’s real crude nature….. It is all well done observation. I do I do accept the facts.
Neo says
The cost of a wife isn’t that different from hiring a professional. The difference comes when you don’t have to pay dearly to divorce the professional.