How many dates before you kiss? There are so many questions that pop into your brain in any new relationship.
*How long should I wait to call her?
*When and how should we hold hands?
*When should be kiss?
*How should you kiss her?
The list goes on.
No worries because we are going to have a look at various scenarios and give you the take action expert information you need in your back pocket when you are looking to make a move.
And it’s not just about “when” to kiss her. You also need to know “how” to kiss her.
Information is knowledge and knowledge is power and trust me on this one, you just don’t want to blow it because first impressions can NOT be erased.
Let’s start by looking into how long you should wait until you contact her after your first encounter.
How Long Should You Wait Until You Call Her After Your First Date
Ask Men seem to think they have the answer for this one. I was a little surprised this their response but I guess it does make sense. These dating and relationship experts say you should wait a week to call her after your first date.
Of course you want to be that guy that jumps right in and woo’s her off her feet, falling head over heels in love with each other. But you’re going to have to save that one for the movies because it just doesn’t happen in real life.
Now there are a few exceptions to the rules here. For example, if you are drop dead gorgeous, you can pretty much call her whenever you want. Add “nice guy” into the equation and you’re golden.
However, if you are like a 7 or 7.5 in the looks department, you need to turn your phone off, or at least silence the ringer and wait a week. Studies show there is something to art of being elusive. It stirs up interest and makes you a more interesting candidate.
Everyone wants what they don’t have right?
And when you assume someone else has a life and is actually too busy to contact you that naturally makes you want them to contact you all the more, right?
Make her feel a little needy and perhaps self-confident. That just means the ball will be in your court when that week is up and you make the call. She will be head over heels flattered no matter what you tell her.
If you want to master the art of dating, you’ve got to take yourself and literally put it in the other person’s shoes. Try and think like they are thinking on the receiving end and act accordingly.
You need to focus on hook, line and sinker and that’s going to take time, a weeks worth if my calculations are correct.
Relax and enjoy, the week will be up before you know it and the proof that you did the right thing will be on the other end of the call.
Next Up…
When And How Should You Hold Hands
Believe it or not, there are steps as to how you should smoothly slip in to hold a girls hand. But first, how long should you wait?
Experts suggest you go with your gut on this one. Do it when it feels natural. Even better, you should just ask her if you can hold her hand. It won’t take you long if she’s feeling the same vibe or not.
There is no “right” or “wrong” time. Be confident and go for it when you are ready.
Steps To Hold Her Hand
The first thing you need to do according to experts at Wikihow is to relax and stay calm. The nerves will eat you up and spit you out if you let them.
Here are three sections to your approach:
Section One – Attempting The Approach
Take action to make her feel good about herself inside-out. Chances are you are both a little nervous so one of the best moves you can make is to make her feel good about herself. Smile and give her a nice compliment. And make sure you are feeling some positive vibe from her before you go for it.
Move into her personal space. This is a little tricky but with practice makes perfect. You need to get your hand into striking distance. So if you are sitting just gradually and as non-awkwardly as possible, inch your hand close to hers. If you happen to be standing do the same.
Reach out and touch her. Before you actually hold her hand, you should touch her physically. Maybe put your hand on her shoulder or give her a friendly hug. Anything that establishes physical contact to initiate the handholding process.
Take a chill pill if she doesn’t want to. The truth is, not every girl likes to hold hands so don’t be offending if your girl is one of them. If this girl stones you and completely pulls away then she likely doesn’t want anything to do with you that way. However, if she just pulls her hand away but still stays close to you, the story is likely different.
Section Two – Become Pro In Hand-Holding
Gently slip your hand beneath hers. With this move you are taking the bull by the horns and there’s no turning back. No doubt you are nervous so if you like just let your hands touch for a few seconds first.
Kinda like testing the water temperature before you jump in.
Calm your nerves and slip your hand on top of hers. Then just let your fingers rest on top of her hand, exploring the waters so to speak.
Consider palming each other. The palm-to-palm technique is probably the most popular form of handholding. All you do is maneuver your hand so both palms are facing together.
This is also great positioning if you want to get playful with your fingers.
Basic hand clasping. Simply touch your palms together and from three you can fully clasp your hands together and mingle your fingers together. It really doesn’t matter whether you are sitting down or standing up for this one.
Pinky hook-up. This is more of a flirtatious handholding technique. All you’ve got to do is brush hands together and sneak your pinky finger over to grab hers. It’s playful and fun and the least invasive handholding method.
You might want to wait to try this one until you are a little more comfy together.
Section Three – It’s Time To Turn Pro-Status
Understand it’s quite normal to take a break. Just because you are holding hands, doesn’t mean you can’t unlock hands until the night is done. That’s just icky clammy yucky! It’s perfectly okay to stop and start again as you like. Besides, that’s much more natural.
Don’t be scared to change it up. Most couples hold hands all sorts of different ways and rarely ever stick to one technique. Change is good so make sure you experiment with your date and change it up. It may take a little experimenting to uncover your perfect.
Going in for the hand kiss is magical. Many guys wouldn’t ever think of this move but if you are confident and daring, you’re going to score bonus points with the hand kiss. All you’ve got to do is gently bring her hand up and gently brush your lips across the top of it. Make sure you are looking at her eyes for added effect.
Who would have ever thought there was an art to holding a girls hand? Now that you’ve got this information in your back pocket, it’s time to bite the bullet and start experimenting.
So When Should You Kiss A Girl? How Many Dates Before You Kiss?
First things first, you’ve got to figure out how to tell if a girl wants to lock lips with you. According to dating and relationship experts at eHarmony, the first kiss is VIP in establishing any sort of connection. There is no real rule on after how many dates you should kiss a girl.
Here are a few proven tips that will help you call the strike when it comes to the best time to kiss a girl.
Tip 1 – Paying Close Attention To The Graze
How this girl reacts to closeness in general and your casual touches speaks wonders in the kissing department. If she is pulling away from you, then you better cool your jets for a bit. If on the other hand she is encouraging you with your closeness, you might better dive right in for that first kiss.
There’s only one way to find out right?
Tip 2 – Play The Hug Card
A hug really does speak a zillion words. How a girl hugs you, says wonders about whether or not you should go in for the kiss or not.
Does she pull you closer?
Is it warm and inviting?
Is she stiff and distant?
Does she press her body against yours?
Figure out what sort of hugger she is and that should be a pretty clear-cut indicator of whether or not she is up for kissing or not.
Newsflash – A good hug really does warm her up nicely for the kiss. Go with your gut here and you’ll do just fine.
Tip 3 – Is She Excited Or Not?
You should be able to tell whether this girl is eager or not. Is she showing you with words and body language that she really doesn’t want the date to end? Or is she basically closed off to you and running for the door?
It’s up to you to figure this out because it’s your direct route to kiss or not to kiss.
Does she suggest going for coffee after your date or perhaps having a drink?
If so, you better take advantage of the moment and lay a nice one on her…just saying.
Tip 4 – Step Up To The Plate And Just Ask Her
Some women find it extremely attractive if you just ask her straight up if you can kiss her. This means “before” you decide to actually do it gentlemen! This is playing it safe but there’s nothing wrong with that in this wild and wacky dating world of ours.
If she really doesn’t want to kiss you full on, she always has the option of turning her cheek to you. Means you get a little nibble but not the real deal just yet.
Don’t read too much into this but asking her is one direct route to get answers straight up.
Tip 5 – Make It Memorable
Woman are naturally more emotional than guys and the tenderness and romance of the moment really does matter.
Try and catch her off guard, not when she is expecting to be kissed. The key to timing it right is to pay attention to her cues. Follow her words and body language.
Relax and follow your intuition and you will do just fine. Confidence is everything when it comes to dating. Even when it comes to that very first kiss.
How Should You Kiss Her?
No doubt that first kiss is nervously exciting. It can even be complicated if you make it that way.
What happens if you bonk heads?
What if you miss the lips altogether?
Remember, 99% of the stuff you worry about never happens.
Time for us to look at the steps you need to pay attention to in order to kiss her perfectly. Or at least set yourself up to find your perfect.
Practice makes perfect and if you expect to nail this first time around, you are setting yourself up to be disappointed. Give yourself a break, use these tips, take your time and you will eventually become a magical kisser.
Step One – Check your breath if you want to plant the perfect kiss. This means you need to brush your teeth, floss and use mouthwash, chew minty gum and steer clear of garlic and other strong odors.
A gross mouth is a total turn off.
Step Two – Keep up with your main hygiene. This means, have a shower and wash your hair, use deodorant and cologne. Basically, you want to smell nicely inviting and if you have issues with excess sweating or body odor, make an appointment with your doctor and get on top of it pronto.
Step Three – Make your lips kissable. So many guys don’t pay attention to their lips and they should. This includes wearing lip chap that has sunscreen. There’s nothing worse than a guy with chapped, dry, cracky lips – YUK!
So lube up your lips and make yourself totally kissable.
Step Four – It doesn’t hurt to give her a compliment before you kiss her. Everyone wants to hear nice things right? So why not give her a reason to smile and relax a little before you actually kiss her? Makes sense to me!
Step Five – Do your best to actually make physical contact with her before you kiss her. There’s nothing more awkward than leaning in to kiss a girl and nothing touches but your lips. Or worse yet, you miss altogether.
Make a point of touching her on the shoulder or face in the least before you take the plunge. You will warm her up some and perhaps calm her nerves because no doubt she’s feeling them too.
Step Six – When you are set to actually kiss her, stop talking. Make your first kiss a memorable one by pausing for a second in silence before you make it happen. This means, all focus is on the girl and you’re going to make her feel receptive and open just for doing that.
Make sure you lock eyes regardless of the nerves and kiss her like you mean it.
Step Seven – Pay attention to the clues and make sure she wants you to kiss her. It’s important that she is showing you with her body actions and words whether or not she wants to kiss you. If she is pulling back and looking uncomfortable, you might want to postpone your kiss for another time.
Step Eight – If you are feeling the vibe then it’s time to engage. If she is showing you with open arms she would like you to kiss her, then it’s time to make your move. This is when you need to take action to move into her personal space and let the magic begin.
Step Nine – Here’s where you get to go in for the kiss, lips slightly parted just like you are about to say hello. Try not to be like grandma and pucker up – Eek!
Step Ten – VIP – Make sure you tilt your head. If you don’t tilt your head, you will smack heads and that’s not cool. When you tilt your head just a little it makes it much easier to kiss. Just make sure you are tilting the opposite direction of the girl you are trying to kiss.
Laugh about it if you do go the same way.
Step Eleven – Please, please, please make sure you keep your eyes closed when you are kissing. It’s just freaking creepy if you don’t. I can guarantee you, nobody likes it when you are in the intimate kissing zone and if you open your eyes and see these big eyeballs staring at you.
Step Twelve – If you keep kissing be gentle please. Usually, a kiss leads to a little more. Seriously, how many people can leave it at one kiss. This just means you need to keep the kisses soft and not forced and stop every once in a while for a breath.
Step Thirteen – Be wary of your hands. A kiss doesn’t mean you have permission to roam freely. Take this one step at a time. Be safe and touch her hair, face and shoulders, but leave it at that please.
Step Fourteen – Never-mind the tongue. There’s no need to go crazy. Do not use the tongue at this point please. Just stick with the kiss to start.
Step Fifteen – Easy pease with the saliva. The grossest thing on the planet is a guy that slobbers all over you. That’s just totally disgusting. You might have to swallow but even that is really gross.
Newsflash – Keep the saliva to yourself and do not bring it into the kiss…please.
Step Sixteen – Don’t forget to breathe please. You do need to come up for air when you are breathing. Simply pull away gently and take a breath if you are going in for more. The last thing you need to do is pass out for lack of air!
Step Seventeen – Take a chill pill. There is no need to rush the first kiss. Take your time and try and make it as natural as possible, minus the nerves. You need to enjoy it and saver the moment. Need I say more?
Step Eighteen – Don’t forget to smile after the kiss. It’s not like you need to say anything specific but you do need to smile just because a smile says everything you are too tongue tied to say!
Enjoy the moment and don’t read too much into it.
When you are kissing a girl for the first time, it’s an art in the making. You will never ever in a zillion years get it right the first time. But with a little practice, you will improve and be the guy that every gal wants to kiss.
Well, maybe not quite like that but you get the idea.
Final Words
When you are looking to figure out how many dates you need before you should kiss a girl, it can really get confusing.
The Truth? There really isn’t a perfect response.
You need to use the cues your girl is giving you. Add to that your confidence and experience level and add a dash of bullish passion.
If it’s meant to be, it will be as awkward as it might be.
Relax and have fun with this and you will make it happen.
