She may be your ex girlfriend, or she may be someone who is so ‘in love’ with you that she just will not leave you alone. She calls, texts, shows up, and pretty much stalks you. She makes you feel weird and she doesn’t seem to get the hint, even if you tell her to her face. How are you supposed to get a woman like this out of your life?
Some Women Thrive On Negative Attention
There are some women (just like men) who seem to like being rejected, hurt, and angry. They have a victim mentality which forces them to believe they are not worthy of happiness – and that being hurt is a normal part of life. They seemingly search out things to be hurt about, including being rejected by men in small and large ways.
There are other women who are just clueless and think that if they keep trying you will eventually see the error of your ways. In their heads, they are already in a relationship with you and you just have not ‘come around’ yet.
There are other women who are desperate and will take anything they can get if there is a small chance that they could get together with you. Therefore, by giving them any hope at all, they will hang on and try to win you over.
There are also women who will not let go. This is the ex girlfriend who cannot accept defeat, and she will make your life a living hell until you get her out of it.
How To Get A Woman Out Of Your Life
If you are ready to get these women out of your life so that you can form healthier relationships with other women, then following are some tips to help you do so.
Keep in mind, I am not promoting treating women with disrespect or hurting their feelings, but there is only so much you can take. Sometimes you have to be a little harsher to get unstable women out of your life.
Your First Step Is To Be Brutally Honest
This is your first and kindest step, and should technically be your only step (but some women won’t accept it.)
Tell the woman exactly how you feel and let her know that you no longer want her in your life. Don’t let her have any hope that your feelings will change, because she may keep hanging on then. When there is a small glimmer of hope, no matter how small, some women will hold onto it with everything they have.
- Be clear.
- Be honest.
- Be as nice as possible.
- Don’t leave any room for hope.
“Casandra, I don’t have any feelings towards you, and I don’t want to have any type of relationship with you. Even being friends is out of the question. I would like you to leave me alone. No more calls, no more texts…no more nothing. I want you out of life completely.”
Hopefully she will get the message and back off at this point, but if she doesn’t, you should start to do things to back up your honesty and prove that you are serious.
Don’t Respond To Her In Any Way
If you see a text from her, delete it. Don’t even read it, because if she sees that you read it, she may get her hopes up that you are not serious about wanting her out of your life.
- Don’t answer her calls.
- Block her on social sites.
- Don’t talk about her to your friends or her friends or ANYONE!
- Don’t let her name escape your lips.
It may sound crazy that a woman will hang on to hope just because she knows that you looked at something she wrote you or because you mentioned her, but desperate people are like that.
Stay strong and make her name, her history with you, and anything to do with her a taboo subject.
Don’t Acknowledge Her If She Comes Around
I never recommend the silent treatment to anyone in a relationship (friendship or romantic), but if you are trying to get a message across to a woman who will not give up, the silent treatment will work wonders.
It may make her a little crazy, because it is, in my opinion, an abusive thing to do to someone. (You are leaving them to their own thoughts and treating them as if they are not even there.)
But, again, if she doesn’t get the message, and she shows up in your space, you cannot respond to her or else she WILL hold onto the hope that there is a chance things will work out. If you respond to her, she will ponder how to get you. She will cry and be hurt and angry and upset all the time as she waits for you to finally come to her.
But if you give her the silent treatment, she will start to realize that there is no hope with you. She will have to deal with the fact that you are not responding to her. She may label you a jerk (which is a good thing because she will get strength to move on.) She should start to come around to the fact that there is no hope. In short, the silent treatment, in this case, is the kinder choice.
So, if she comes up to after you clearly told her you no longer want to talk to her or be in her life, then walk away without saying a word.
If she grabs onto you, shake her off and walk away without saying a word. Do not make eye contact. Do not talk to her. As hard as it may be to do this to someone, do not acknowledge her. Just walk away.
Flirt With Other Women
Even though you are not responding to her and have blocked her from your social sites, a woman who will not let go is probably still watching you in one form or the other.
Maybe her friends are keeping tabs on you or maybe she just happens to frequent the same places you are at. Flirting with other women will help solidify the fact that you are just not into her. Have a good time with other women and hopefully she will lose her hope and start to actively deal with her feelings and move on to happier and healthier relationships herself.
Get A Restraining Order
If all of the above doesn’t work, and she is harassing you and making your life a living hell, then you are dealing with a mentally unstable woman and you need to protect yourself. She may let her erratic emotions guide her decisions, which means that you or someone you love could get hurt. Don’t take that chance.
The threat of being fined or jailed may make her more aware that she NEEDS to leave you alone.