Shyness most certainly can be cute but it can also be a pain in the rear when you are just too shy to function around girls.
Talk about a thorn in your side!
When it comes to overcoming shyness and learning how to be confident around girls, these specialists will set you on the right track.
Don’t feel bad because plenty of men aren’t very confident around the opposite sex and you need to understand this isn’t the end of the world.
FACT – Unfortunately, shyness creates fear and steals the “want” to be social. Perhaps because you might think you’re going to embarrass yourself.
Time for you to build your brain strong and use this step-by-step approach to focus your energy positively on overcoming your shyness so you can attract and engage with the women of your choosing.
Sounds pretty fantastic, doesn’t it?
How To Not Be Shy Around Girls
Research and reflect on what shyness really means
No doubt, the characteristics of shyness show face differently with each person and special circumstance. When you understand what triggers your shyness and what reactions you will have, the battle is half won.
*Afraid to talk in any given social situation
*Talking too quietly, like a mouse
*Steering clear of large groups and social gatherings
*Yapping a mile a minute because of nerves
Know what conditions trigger your shyness
What’s important to note is that everyone becomes somewhat shy from time to time, that’s natural and comforting. This can be used to help you take positive action to kick your shyness in the butt.
When you get your head prepared ahead of time to deal with your shyness, then you’re less likely to have so many issues.
Mind over matter is magical.
Do your homework and get prepared to face your shyness challenges head on and get rid of the scary unknowns.
Rejig your internal talk
What does this really mean?
If you are always thinking and bashing yourself negatively because of your shyness, that’s not going to help you. All that does is make a bigger issue of your shyness than it’s needed.
Studies show if you say positive things and think positive actions, you open your mind to actually make these thoughts and words come true. As hard as this sounds, you’ve got to believe.
You can lie to yourself if you like, to flip your social awkwardness or extreme nervousness, making your brain positive and deterring your shyness symptoms from kicking in.
Time to talk positive to yourself and eventually you will believe it if you stick to it.
*I really am amazing!
*I am going to jump in and meet more people socially!
*I am going to start talking to different people everyday!
*I know I can do it!
Steer clear of reflecting on what people are communicating
So many times a person’s shyness is set up prematurely because they have set beliefs in their brain before they even meet anyone. Talk about setting yourself up to fail!
If you believe everyone and their dog sees you in a particular light, as a shy guy that’s nervous and awkward, then you are starting the race with no running shoes.
More often than not, nobody thinks the negative thoughts in your brain so you need to get rid of it fast please.
Value what people say and not what you speculatively think they might be thinking. Talk about creating false paranoia.
Pay attention only to the people you are actually conversing with
Shy people often get uncomfortable when the center of attention is around them, which makes sense. A way to overcome this is to shift the center of attention to someone else and stop using “me” and “I.”
Trust me, when other people are doing the talking for the most part, you will feel less anxiously shy. That’s just how the cookie crumbles.
Focus on simply having a great time
When you make sure you’re having a good time, you don’t really get the chance to feel very shy. Allow yourself to relax and have fun and this will help you to throw your shy card in the garbage for good.
Sounds pretty fantastic, doesn’t it?
Don’t be afraid to dress to impress the girls
When you are looking to make a fabulous first impression and feel good about yourself, it’s important you dress for the part. What you wear really doesn’t matter too much. More importantly, you need to wear clothing you look good in.
Find the look that makes you feel more secure in you and this will help you kick your shyness out the door.
Become an expert on things you are interested in
When you have strong knowledge in your brain on specific topics, this gives you the confidence you need to hold a great conversation with someone. A wide diversity of knowledge is your best route here.
Open your mind and you will open your ability to talk with many different girls on many different subjects, and that’s magical.
Use this tactic to help vamoose your shyness for good.
Practice eye contact whenever you are talking with someone
When you are looking to connect with someone, it goes so much deeper than just talking. That’s just the tip of the iceberg!
Experts agree what’s often more important is how you say things. When you give the person in front of you visual conversation, you are telling them they matter and you do care.
This will help take the weirdness out of the air and along with that goes your shyness too.
Set yourself up for success with attainable goals
Keep it easy and start all conversations off with “hi” when talking with a girl. This is a small step forward in getting yourself comfortable fast so you can take it to the next level and ignore your shyness tendencies.
And when it comes to expectations, make sure you keep it real.
If you have never spoken to the captain of the basketball team before and think you’re just going to magically say a few words and go out with her, then you’re a nut!
First start by building up your self-confidence talking with a lots of little people and the more you get comfortable in this, the better. Maybe after that you can take a stab at the totally hot captain of the girl’s basketball team.
Practice what you want to see
A mirror is essential if you are looking to overcome your shyness by teaching yourself to look how you want to look when talking with a girl.
Take a look at your facial expressions and adjust accordingly. Maybe you will notice you are fidgety or have a nervous twitch that’s visible. Work to get rid of them!
Learn to smile with confidence so that when you are in the presence of the girl, you already know how magical your smile looks.
Again, mind over matter!
Don’t hide behind your shyness
When you are straight up honest about your shyness with a girl that really can be sweet. Let her know you are shy but really want to talk with her. In my experience, girls seem to favor the shy guys.
Bottom line…Use your shyness as a route to get in the door and not as an obstacle to keep you out.
*Is it okay if we find a quiet place to sit, I’m kind of shy?
*Sorry, I’m really bad at meeting new people because I get a little shy.
Turn your shyness humorous
Make fun of yourself by making a shy joke at your expense. When you can laugh at yourself, you’re going to take the pressure off and your shyness isn’t going to be such an issue. That may seem a little corny but they definitely can’t hurt!
*Wish I could make you smile with a good joke but I never fail to forget the punchline because I’m so bloody shy.
*Do I look little to you? Being shy makes me feel so tiny.
Always have someone flying beside you
For nervous shy people, having a friend beside you when you’re meeting a girl for the first time is a great move. This takes you out of the spotlight a little, when the attention gets divided between three people and not just two.
Take action to live in the now
Stop worrying about what might happen down the road or in future conversations.
Truth – If you are focusing on what’s happening right now, it’s much easier to stay focused and this will squash excess stress and shyness quickly.
It takes courage to put yourself out there for a girl. Rejection is scary but so is never trying.
There are two sides to every coin and when you battle and win against your shyness a whole new world with women awaits.
Accept your shyness as just a part of you
Most guys that are shy around girls get totally frustrated with this. If this is your mindset, then you are contributing to the problem.
Shyness isn’t a disease. It’s just a part of you and the sooner you accept this, the better.
Stop beating yourself up for it and prepare your mind to just deal with it. You’ve got nothing to lose and everything to gain.
Understand your personal value
Everyone wants to be accepted and loved as they are.
Newsflash! That’s what you deserve, nothing less.
Often people act shy because they feel they just aren’t good enough. So theory has it if you stop thinking you are “less than,” the shyness will become less of an issue.
Find your value and know it. Get to know yourself from the inside out and focus on your strengths, what makes you proud and accomplished.
Do this and your shyness doesn’t stand a chance.
Please stop worshiping the girls
When it comes to shy men, they usually zone in on a girl they like and treat her like a princess. Even with little to nil communication, they still think she is the most amazing person on the planet.
That’s just borderline wrong.
What happens is you create this impossible fake image of her in your mind and that fact alone makes it impossible for you to just be yourself around her.
Just think of how nervous you would feel meeting the queen or Madonna?
No matter how amazing you think a girl is, she does have flaws and she is human. Deal with it realistically and your shyness won’t get in the way.
Know that any encounter with people you don’t know is going to be a little weird
It doesn’t matter who you are because meeting anyone for the first time is going to make you a little nervous in the least.
In other words, you aren’t anything special because you are shy. It’s naturally for worries to arise when any two people meet or you step into a new group of people.
The sooner you accept this, the better because it steels away another reason for you to not approach a girl just because you are shy. That’s just lame.
Practice being a little more positively assertive and bold
Fake that you are bold and strong if you have to, until you actually become this. Play the acting game and pretend you are Mr. Assertive with new people.
This is going to help you build your internal confidence so you actually forget about your shyness when it comes to girls.
Learning how to not be shy around girls takes research, time, practice and a strong mind and will.
Use these proven steps and pointers to help you figure out how to nip your shyness in the bud so you can land the girl of your dreams.
If you really want to, you can.
Best of luck!