In Season 4 (Italy) of the Jersey Shore, Snooki finally finds love with her boyfriend Jionni from back home. She appears to be completely in love but, due in large part to the Situation’s claim that he and Snooki hooked up while Snooki was with Jionni, their phone conversations have become increasingly tense. In fact, things escalate to the point where Snooki seemingly loses her dim-witted but good-natured self, only to become sad and depressed. Seeing this, the fellow roommates believe that Jionni is clearly to blame and want to have an intervention where they share their feelings. As you can imagine, Snooki doesn’t want the intervention because she doesn’t agree with them.
This scenario begs the question: who is correct? Are the roommates with their outsider perspective seeing things more clearly, or is Snooki seeing them more accurately because it is, after all, her relationship? Research has examined this issue by having students assess their own relationship’s quality, how long they thought it would last, as well as their confidence in their assessments.1 The researchers also contacted the students’ roommates and parents and asked them identical questions about the students’ romances. To determine the accuracy of their predictions about the relationships’ longevity, the research team followed-up at 6 and 12 months after the initial assessments to see if the relationships were still together (click here for more about what predicts break-up).
So who was most confident in their predictions? The students. The roommates and parents were understandably less confident, perhaps because they felt they had less detailed information about the relationship. But, who was most accurate? Roommates, followed by parents and then the students! That’s right, the students provided the least accurate forecasts about the fate of their relationships even though they were reporting on their own relationships. Students had the potentially terrible combination of being supremely confident in a flawed assessment. It seems that students highlighted the best parts of their relationships, making them feel more positive overall than the objective reality warranted (rose-colored glasses, anyone?).
These findings suggest that if your friends, roommates, or parents express concern over your relationship you might be wise to listen to them, even if you think they don’t know what they are talking about. In the case of the Jersey Shore roommates, they may be on to something with their assessment of Snooki and Jionni’s relationship…after all, they (especially Pauly D and Vinny) have been right all along about Sammi and Ronnie’s terrible relationship.
Want to learn more about Jersey Shore relationships? Click here.
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1MacDonald, T. K., & Ross, M. (1999). Assessing the accuracy of predictions about dating relationships: How and why do lovers’ predictions differ from those made by observers?. Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, 25(11), 1417-1429. doi:10.1177/0146167299259007
Dr. Gary Lewandowski – Science of Relationships articles | Website
Dr. Lewandowski’s research explores the self’s role in romantic relationships focusing on attraction, relationship initiation, love, infidelity, relationship maintenance, and break-up. Recognized as one of the Princeton Review’s Top 300 Professors, he has also authored dozens of publications for both academic and non-academic audiences.
