We don’t mind that they weren’t fond of the term, but we do take offense to them misreporting the findings of the study. They say that (in addition to hating the term), “…you can hate are the people who use them [relfies] too much, that is to say, happy couples who post a lot of selfies together. According to the same researchers who coined relfie, the whole point of doing so was to find out what the use of such hot pix indicates about the status of the relationship illustrated therein.”
Along with Jezebel, several other media outlets misreported that people don’t like other people who post relfies. Our study DID NOT find this. We did find that:
1) People perceive those who post relfies and have a dyadic relationship status (“in a relationship with…”) as having BETTER relationships than Facebook users who don’t.
2) Your Facebook page is a window into your relationship. Simply by looking at your Facebook page, strangers can guess your relationship quality. If your relationship is going well, your relfie and other aspects of your profile show it.
3) All Facebook relationship information isn’t created equally. People especially DON’T LIKE other Facebook users who make overly-sappy, uber-romantic posts.
TL;DR: Relfies aren’t bad. They won’t make your friends hate you. In fact, others will think your relationship is going really well if you post your relfies, and they might just be right!
In fact, we love relfies so much that we’ve created a site to celebrate them. Check out Relfie.us to share your relfies and see others’ pictures!
Setting the record straight…
Several media outlets inaccurately stated that this research was conducted as part of the Science of Relationships book. The research was actually conducted at Haverford College and the University of Toronto by Ms. Lydia Emery, Dr. Amy Muise, Ms. Liza Alpert, and Dr. Benjamin Le, and will appear in a forthcoming issue of the journal Personal Relationships.
Emery, L. F., Muise, A., & Alpert, E., & Le, B. (in press). Do we look happy? Perceptions of romantic relationship quality on Facebook. Personal Relationships.
Dr. Le’s research focuses on commitment, including the factors associated with commitment and its role in promoting maintenance. He has published on the topics of breakup, geographic separation, infidelity, social networks, cognition, and need fulfillment and emotions in relationships.
image source: www.citynews.ca