When you are drawn to a guy and you aren’t sure how you feel about it, that makes it crazy difficult. It’s tough to know whether you should be more than friends with this guy or not.
Here are a few telltale indicators the guy you have your eyes on wants to be more than friends. Take a look and see whether or not you think this man is totally into you.
Signs He Wants To Be More Than Friends
Here are numerous indicators a man wants to be much more than friends with you. Doesn’t mean he is right. Just means the door of opportunity is wide open.
He’s Always Giving You Priority Attention
If a man isn’t totally interested in a girl, he’s not going to give her the time of day. If you are getting quality attention from a man, then he is totally into you. He’s going to listen intensively about what you have to say and he’s not going to interrupt you.
Even if you are saying something totally silly and not important, he is going to make sure all eyes are on you.
Continuously Looking For The Glance
If a guy is interested in you, he’s going to make sure he’s in the perfect spot to admire you. You might catch his glance and that’s exactly what he wants.
Perhaps you are in the same class and he’s going to spend the majority of his time making sure you know he’s watching you.
This is a solid signal, he wants to get to know you on a level much higher than just friends.
The Nerves Are In Your Face
If a man has a serious crush on you, he’s going to be nervous at some point. It might be obvious or nonchalant but it will be there.
Sure, he might be totally normal around his friends, but when you come into view, he could very well start sweating and changing his normal behaviors with way too much obviousness…is that even a word?
He’s Up For Complimenting Everything That Comes Out Of Your Mouth
No matter what, if a man is into you, he is going to make you feel like everything you say is golden.
What does this mean?
He’s simply trying to tell you that you are his perfect match.
Even when you make a small comment, he will make you feel like you deserve a compliment.
Super sweet if you ask me.
All he’s trying to accomplish is to show you that you are a match for him and he’s willing to prove that to you.
He Is Happy To Ring You Just To Say Hello
Does it get much better than this?
More often than not a man is going to ring you for a specific reason. However, when he calls you for no “real” reason at all, that means everything.
He’s telling you straight up that he just wants to connect and talk with you and that’s magical.
This Guy Is Happy To Laugh At All Your Jokes
Now there’s a difference between a man laughing at your jokes and laughing at everything to try and get you to smile. The second is fake and definitely overdoing it.
When a man laughs at your lame jokes, he just wants you to feel comfortable and open up to him; be comfortable when he’s around.
This means, he is going to support you when life gets tough and that’s invaluable. He doesn’t care if he’s the only one laughing because he wants you to know he is there for you.
The Jealous Card Is Always There
If a man wants to be more than just friends with you, he’s certainly not going to be okay if you are seeing other guys. Heck, he probably won’t even be good with men checking you out and that’s not a bad thing.
Guys are territorial and they want to know they have the undivided attention of the girl they are interested in and they do not like competition or sharing.
A man that wants to be more than friends with you can’t picture you with anyone but him and that’s what makes him freaky jealous.
The gentleman that wants you is going to instinctively want to prove to you beyond the shadow of a doubt he is oodles better than any other man around you. He’s not going to like you being close to guys because in the primitive world that means they are a threat.
Try and understand this one please.
The Man Lets You Know He Knows What You Want, Like And Detest
This is the guy that knows your favorite dress, color, and what sort of movies you like to see. In fact, he will provably do his time and play private investigator for a while to figure out all your likes and dislikes so he can accommodate.
Newsflash – If he’s doing this, he is totally into you!
He’s going to buy you little gifts he can’t resist because he knows they are going to put a smile on your face and they will suit you perfectly.
The boy just wants you to feel special and he’s willing to show you just how special he knows you are.
Body Contact Is Priority One
This doesn’t mean you are hopping in the sac with him. What it means is that he is always looking for opportunities to brush your hand, give you a hug, or make any sort of body contact he can as casually and safely as possible.
If he is making a point of touching you, he is trying to tell you he would be delighted if you would be more than friends with him.
How you respond back will dictate your path.
He’s Pro At Imitating
When a guy likes a gal more than causally, he is going to try hard to change his behaviors to match you, the damsel in distress! Perhaps he will suddenly start listening to the music you listen to or get caught up with a television series you are hooked on.
This guy is just trying to show you that he is open and versatile and cares about what you want and like. That says wonders don’t you think?
This Man Teases You Nicely
When a boy teases you romantically or in a nice and friendly manner, he is showing you that all eyes are on you and he just wants to get to know you better. He will tend to crack jokes that are lame but make you laugh.
He’s going to do is best to make you feel sexy and secure in your skin so he can slip in and start making a connection.
Bottom Line…If a guy is teasing you in a fun way, he wants to be more than friends with you.
This Man Is The First One To Notice Physical Changes
When a guy likes a girl, he is on full red alert to comment on any subtle change he sees in you that is new. If you cut your hair, he will notice. If you got your eyebrows waxed, he will notice too.
It really doesn’t matter how subtle the change, because a guy that is interested in you will notice and makes sure you know that.
The Social Media Connection
When a guy likes a girl, he’s going to do his best to crack into her social media scene and make his presence noticed. He might just post to say hi or comment on a selfie you took. It really doesn’t matter what it is.
What’s important is that he is watching your moves and making sure you know this.
The Eye Contact Is Straight Up
When a man makes eye contact with you when you are talking, he is showing you that he is fully concentrating on you. Looking in your eyes shows you that he admires you and if he puts his phone down to give you the undivided attention you want, need and deserve, that’s proof he wants to hook up with you.
When You Give Him Something, He Lights Up
When a guy likes you more than a friend, he will go out of his way to make sure you know he appreciates anything and everything you do for him. It really doesn’t matter how petty they seem, because he treasures each one of them.
He’s going to remind you of the cute gifts you gave him and let you know they are absolutely perfect. Men that show you they appreciate the little things are worth a little attention.
His General Tone Flips When He Talks With You
Men that really like a girl are going to use a special tone when they talk to her. It’s not the one they use talking with family or friends, so pay close attention.
Does his voice get softer when he talks to you?
Sure, he’s trying to sound cool and collected but often trying a tad too hard. All he’s trying to do is show you the best way he can that you are appreciated and special to him.
There’s No Stopping When It Comes To Buying You Things
Men are programmed as providers and naturally want to give the girl they have their eye on all the attention they can. Gifts are one way a man can show you that he really likes you.
It doesn’t matter the money part or how small the gift because it’s the gesture that matters. Maybe he will surprise you with something or secretly hide a gift for you to find.
This guy knows what you like and will buy accordingly, because he’s paying attention to the details. All he wants to do is make you smile inside out.
The Manners Are Always Impeccable Around You
When a boy likes a girl, he’s going to make sure his manners are in check. If you happen to drop something, he will scoop it up for you. He will be first to open the door and maybe even pull out your chair at dinner.
This man wants you to feel at ease around him and is trying to show you that he’s worth your time and attention. Best to give him a chance don’t you think?
He’s Continuously Scrolling Through Your Profile
If a guy really likes you, he’s likely got a photo of your or two that he looks at over and over again. He’s likely thinking about how beautiful you are. Guys buy and connect first with their eyes.
No worries, it’s really not creepy if he can’t get enough of your picture. It’s actually rather sweet.
This Man Is Totally Interested In What Others Say About You
When a guy wants to be more than friends with you, he’s going to show an innate interest in what the people around you are saying about you.
This is all done in a positive light, he wants to hear the good stuff.
No doubt, when observing from the outside, this also puts him in poll position to figure out whether anyone else has their radar set on you. He’s always going to check in with his family and friends and see what they think of you, so beware.
If he really does want to be more than friends with you, he’s going to want to know both the good and the bad. Things that make you smile and the things that irritate the crap out of you. Just so he’s got a heads up on what to avoid.
It’s also imperative that you recognize the red hot signals that a man is using you because love truly is blind. Sometimes when you want so badly for a man to like you this will make you overlook the danger signs when someone is using you.
Important Signals He Is Using You
The Talko relationship experts uncover telltale signs you need to watch out for if you think the guy you are into is using you. That last thing you need is to get hurt.
Commitment Isn’t In His Vocabulary
If you have been hanging out with a man quite a bit, you are fairly wondering if he is thinking about a future with you or not.
At this point, there should be zero issues in asking him about where you both are in your dating relationship.
BEWARE – If this guy does everything in his power to avoid admitting any sort of commitment with you, then you need to be extremely cautious.
There are reasons why men don’t want to commit. Some are valid and others not so much. You just need to make sure you understand why and that you get a straight up answer, because that is what you deserve.
Your Family And Friends Call Him Out
If your friends and family think he is just using you, then you better at least take it into consideration, no matter how hunky-cute he is. Trust me, they are only looking out for your best interest.
When your best friend is telling you that this guy is a creep or he’s just not “the one” for you, then you sure as heck better listen.
The last thing your loved ones want is to see you in another failed relationship.
It’s All About Him In The Bedroom
When a man cares only about himself, he is going to make sure he’s satisfied in bed and it’s hit or miss with you. If it doesn’t happen, he’s really not going to care too much. In other words, he just wants to have his needs met and he needs you to do that.
That’s just plain nasty.
Nip this one in the bud because a healthy relationship is a two way street.
He Never Makes A Point Of Introducing You To His Family Or Friends
When a guy isn’t excited to take you to meet his family at some point, you’ve got to question his motives. Sure, sometimes his excuses are legit, like if he suffers from anxiety issues. But most of the time when a man is “hiding” you from his friends and family, it’s because he doesn’t want them to know about you.
Now it’s up to you to question him why.
Don’t you think you deserve to get to know the people he loves if he really does love you?
You Are The One With The Wallet
This is so wrong. When a guy is mooching off a girl, that’s pretty lame. Historically men are supposed to be the providers. They should want to impress the girl showing her they have manners and want to take care of the bill.
It’s sweet and endearing and shows they are being real and have substance.
So if you are the one paying when you go out and helping with his bills etc., you better give your head a shake and consider the cold hard fact that he is totally using you.
This Guy Wants Favors From You Consistently
It’s give and take in any healthy relationship. You should both want to do favors for each other, no strings attached. However, when a guy is always asking you for favors and never doing anything in return, there’s definitely trouble in your future.
Any man with class is going to be the one wanting to “do” for you, not the other way around.
Your Feelings Come In Last Place
A selfish man looks out for himself and nobody else. This means, he really doesn’t care if he’s always hurting your feelings because he thinks his feelings are priority. Lack of compassion from a man is a bad thing in a relationship.
He should be there for you heart and soul and ultimately if this man is worth your time, it’s your feelings that should come first.
Think about it for a second or two and take action.
Affection Is Non-Existent
You deserve love and affection, actually you need it. If the guy you are with isn’t making you feel special by holding your hand and sneaking the odd kiss, you’ve got to look seriously into the fact he might just be using you.
You see, if he likes you, he should theoretically be all over you.
He should want to get close to you and show the world how much he adores you inside-out.
Plays The Vanishing Card
When a man pays attention to you at certain times and totally ignores you when he feels like it, this is a telltale sign he’s simply using you. What’s important for you to understand is, you deserve a guy that loves and wants you through thick and thin, not just when it’s convenient. That’s just plain yucky!
Suddenly He Appears
If this guy suddenly appears, particularly at night, this is a clear signal he’s just using you when he feels the need. When a man is into a woman, he has a pattern of connection, when he calls or texts or meets up with you.
However, when it’s random and vague, it likely means you are nothing more than a tool for him and that’s not what you deserve.
You Never Really Go Out With Him
If a man is using you, he’s likely never going to take you out to be seen in public with him. And in a healthy relationship, couples go out all the time and do all sorts of different things to get to know each other better and create that amazing connection.
You deserve to go out and have fun with the man you want to build a life with, and if that’s not happening you need to move on fast.
Final Words
The more information, the better when it comes to figuring out whether or not the man you have your radar set on is interested in being more than just friends.
Keep your mind open and look for the good but also be aware of the signals this man is just not who your deserve.
delilah says
i had an a boyfriend but now he’s my ex he is constantly emailing me. he is mean to me. he tries to get me jealous we are in the same classes we only talk on email we never talk in person and he acts like he doesn’t care or he doesn’t love me. when i tell him i love him or miss him he changes the subject. sometimes he gets mad at me over stupid little things. but i’m in love with him and he doesn’t know it. what do i do. it would be so helpful if u could help me
Kate says
Hi, if he is constantly emailing you, then he probably is still interested in you. Give him some space and don’t answer his emails for a while. He might start missing you and want to get back together.
Deb says
First you need to strengthen your boundaries. Figure out what is causing him to get upset and discuss this with him. Explain where you draw the line and why it is uncomfortable for you and, most importantly, what you will and will not accept going forward (if there is a forward). You must stick to your guns and enforce your boundaries or things will not change. You must also figure out if his attention to you is healthy or not. Some men need the attention because it boosts their self esteem to have ‘back up’. I’m not saying this has anything to do with you but I am saying that some men are just insecure in that way. It’s not so much about what you need to do but what he needs to do in the future that will not cross your boundaries. You deserve respectful behavior and if he can’t abide and respect your boundaries then find someone who will. You are not trying to change him it’s completely up to him whether he wishes to be with you and he knows that you will not tolerate the behavior previously displayed.
Audrey2b says
I am currently talking with a guy who i met online. We’ve hungout at least once a since weve met online about a month ago. We talk on the phone every day and make a plan to meet up during that week. He says enjoys my company shows affection while in public. Really wants to continue to get kniw me to see if we are able build a relationship. I told him that at the moment i and i am tallking to other guys to keep my options open. He said that he was shock and hurt. He also said during the same conversation he LUV me meaning cares for my wellbeing. I tld him i am not into the other guy i am talking with him i enjoy his company. Should i continue eith the guy who says he LUV me to see where it goes?
Kate says
If you like the first guy better then perhaps continue with him and see where it goes. You can always go back online and meet other guys if things won’t work out.
Ellen Martin says
Hey.
My boyfriend and I have been together for almost 3 years of our relationship and we talk mostly everyday of the week and sometimes when we discuss our past together about breaking up with me, I will fall right back to depression and be single. He means so much to me and he always think my father is interfering with our relationship. And I had a guy crush in high school last year and I liked him too and he now friend-zoned me and he cared about me as well. What should I do? I’m so confused because I honestly don’t know what to do. I love my boyfriend to death and there are some parts of the day when he says that he will break up with me because I have been hurt before and I don’t wanna be hurt again so I don’t wanna see my family seeing me being hurt and depressed
Kate says
Hi,
If he keeps telling you that he’s going to be breaking up with you, then he doesn’t care about you as much as you care about him. If you guys break up, you’ll get through it. It’s ok to be single for awhile, it’s not like you are going to be single for the rest of your life. Heartbreaks are hard but you’ll get through it and you’ll eventually find someone else. Let your family help you as well. Make yourself busy, find a new hobby or take a new class, and be with friends. Don’t let yourself be alone and get depressed.
Ellen Martin says
I try not to be depressed everyday of the week. I maintain myself busy for a while and its hard to deal with it if you think about it without being sad because I had dealt with family issues all my life and now I have a boyfriend who was there for me when I need a shoulder to cry on, a hug when I feel sad, everything. I really made a lot of memories with him, even at my high school prom, and graduation. I’m really afraid to lose the person who I love for almost 3 years now and I don’t know what to do next.
Kate says
Have you guys tried to work on your problems? Why does he want to break up with you?
Ellen Martin says
He has been planning to break up with me since high school because we live far away from each other and he always thinks its because of my father but its not. And we always talk about it over the phone trying to convince him to now break up with me. I honestly don’t know what to do. I feel heartbroken every time I think about it.
Kate says
Seems like he has made up his mind and it’s just a matter of time when he breaks up with you. There’s nothing really you can do if he doesn’t want to be with you anymore. You deserve someone who actually wants to be with you and is fully committed to your relationship.
Shanna Webster says
Why all the run on sentences sweetie. Learn to pause, stop, take a breath. It’s easy. See all the sentences and periods? Try it. You might like it.
Ashley says
Try being a little less harsh. If this really bothers you, then you have more issues than just being a grammar nazi. Grow up, because you’re not giving advice off of what she asked and its frankly coming off pretty unnecessary and rude. Try being nicer…you might like it.
Anomonus help advice says
I have a male friend that We have been spending a lot off time together in 2 months..we had a one night stand and still continued being friends. Feelings fell into place but he doesn’t want to commit as he’s had a really rough past yr. He rings and texts and we still drive around. But I’m so confused as I know he’s been hurt and seems scared off commitments. I’m so confused and don’t know what he wants. What should I do as I really want him to be happy but don’t want to fail him as I know he needs a friend to talk to but is getting harder for me and my feelings. I don’t want to fail him and turn my back on him.
Kate says
That’s great that you care about him and want him to be happy but you have to think about yourself too. You are the one who will get hurt here because you have developed feelings for him.
If he doesn’t want to commit then he doesn’t have enough feelings for you and you should move on.
Subject says
No offense but these hints are “common women knowledge” and are really based on how women behave, not men.
If a man doesn’t say he wants you, you are not “the one”, but that doesn’t mean you are not wanted at all, just means you are perfect for him.
if you want to show him you are interested, give him special treatment, stop teasing and flirting with other guys, only with him. Men like virgins and women like experienced men, and thats a fact, doesn’t mean you should be a virgin its just that we don’t like having to hang around with people who banged you, if you have been with one of his friends show him that thats in the past otherwise thats a red alert for him.
Most guys will still mess up and you are gonna be angry at him for not getting your crazy signs, but thats just what might get him to talk to you haha.
Subject says
EDIT: Not perfect for him* or he might have some concerns
XXX says
we chat at online about all the thing so it’s mean for anything between us.
Kate says
If you chat about all the things online, then you can subtly ask if she/he is dating someone. Pay attention to the clues he/she is giving you.
lexis says
how you know when a guy want to be serious with you but he’s not telling you?
Natalie Doran says
OK, so there’s this guy I like. We have gym together, and he doesn’t even TRY to play with anyone else. Problem is, he doesn’t speak much English, and I speak some Spanish. He looks at me and complements me a lot, and laughs at my lame jokes. He’s offered his jacket when it’s cold, and my friends love him without even meeting him. Should I tell him I like him?
Kate says
Yeah, you can tell him. You might need to translate it to Spanish though to make sure he understands you.
Edith says
Hi. A year ago I met a guy. He kissed me one day and at that time, he said he was serious. But it’s just the matter that I am still a foreign student and he was and now still is not sure whether I will stay in the same city or not. Therefore he didn’t give me any commitment. I was fine at the beginning but recently I start getting confused. I have read a lot of article and talked to friends, but still can not figure out what to do. Should I wait or should quit?
The reasons I feel I should wait:
1. He said he is serious(but in bed a year ago pathetically), but I can tell he is serious too.
2. I don’t think I will ever come across a man like him again with the ingenuity
3. He has me stayed over his place whenever I feel like.(according to signs).
4. He gave me his apartment’s keys(well, to some degree he is just too lazy to open the door sometimes coz i go to his place pretty often.)
5.Some of his best friends know that I stay over sometimes and pretty much meet him every week. (according to the signs too)
6. He said he doesn’t want me to be sad. To some degree he cares about me.
7. He remember what I like and what I don’t.
The reasons I feel I should quit::
1. he said sometimes we should stay as friend. because he doesn’t know which city I will stay. It hurts of course.
2. He shade away some serious problems like “are we friends ”
3. Every time I said I am jealous about other couples because they are openly be together, he is irritated by that. And says the same excuse and hide away. He stops texting me every day after that.
4. I am tired sometimes coz i am so jealous about he puts his arms unconsciously on the other girls shoulder who he claims is just one of his best friend. And again, he is irritated.
5. No one so far in his friend circle knows we slept together for a year. I don’t want to ask.. I know it will just disappoint myself.
6. he said he is already 39 but I am just 24. The age gap is a problem.
I know boys are super good at playing . I don’t want to think he is a jerk but unfortunately what he did sometimes are against all the sign that are on the websites.I don’t want find excuse for him anymore defending him with excuses like:”he is doing the Ph.d and is pretty stress financially.” or “It’s my problem that I can not promise him that I will stay in the same city with him”or “he is 39 and I am just 25.” or “he is hurt by his ex girlfriend so that’s why.”
What exactly should do?
Kate says
Hi, if he’s hiding your relationship from his family and friends, then seems like he doesn’t take you seriously. I can’t tell you exactly what you should do, however, to me, your negatives list is worse than your positives.
Ashley says
I met this guy thru a dating app, Bumble. First night we hung out at a bar with his two other close friends. We had a blast, seemed very natural and fun. His friends even mentioned they felt tension between us already. Well, its now been a few weeks. We hang out a few times a week now. He constantly is hitting me up to hang, always wants me to massage him (I went to school for this, so I’m better than the average bear). We flirt, we’ve hooked up, he wants to cuddle. He kisses on me. We tease and are ALWAYS having a good time in one another’s presence. The other night, he basically friend carded me as he referred to me and said, “well you ARE my FRIEND, right?”…yes, I am. He ended up calling me and we talked for 2hrs on the phone last night and he admitted, “I honestly don’t need the massage, I kind of just like your company and body by me”. Says things like this often…I’m just confused. I should probably ask him what he wants so I can move on if I want more. And I am enjoying getting to know him, but the more I do, the more it develops beyond friendship.
Ashley says
I have a guy friend we met through work. We are coworkers. It’s been 5 years since we became friends. He is has always been nice, sweet, funny and very dependable. I have never seen him more as a friend until now. The beginning of this year I started noticing him a bit more. He hugs me more, bugs me more, always wants my attention, and is more concerned about me and my health. We both have children. He has said many times that he would never raise another mans child so this clearly tells me he doesn’t want anything more than just my friendship. But the way he acts sometimes kinda gives me the impression that he does want something more. He recently told me that I am a tease. That I tease him a lot. When I told him our mutual friends think we should be more than friends he just got red and didn’t say anything. I was the one that broke the silence and said that no way would we ever have a thing. I told him my life was way to complicated. He agreed and said that his life too was too complicated. He also always still hangs out with his sons mother he claims that they are not in a relationship he only has a healthy friendship with her because of their son. I on the other hand just started talking to my child’s father and when I told him he kinda of got upset. I’m so confused I don’t know if he likes me or if just really sees me as a friend.
Kate says
It’s hard to tell. He might like you or he might be very comfortable with you and may see you as a friend only.