“What does it mean if he doesn’t answer my texts?” That’s a question that comes to the table time and time again. It’s safe to say we’ve all been there. You’re talking with a man, and everything seems to be moving along fine. The texting is daily and exciting, when all of a sudden, he stops texting you back.
You try to stay cool and not get too anxious, but when the messages don’t come, you reboot your phone and make sure you didn’t accidentally block his number.
It doesn’t take long for your mind to jump to conclusions, like he’s seeing another girl or maybe you did something to turn him off. Gurl experts understand how stressful this can be, and it’s going to take some brainstorming to figure out why he’s suddenly ignoring your texts.
There are many possibilities for different situations. Keep in mind there are different values of texts. If he doesn’t reply to a “ha-ha” text, it’s not a big deal. Maybe this guy just doesn’t stay consistent with his texting.
One thing you need to keep in perspective is he’s not ignoring your texts because he really likes you and is afraid. Women say this all the time. This thinking gives you false hope that will likely leave you with a broken heart.
The sooner you get to the bottom of why he’s not replying to your texts, the better.
Why Is He Ignoring My Texts All of a Sudden
Here are a few things he means when he’s not replying to your text messages.
He’s Truly Busy
Makes Sense – When a man doesn’t reply to your texts right away, but eventually, he gets back to you in a few hours or a few days, this isn’t such a big deal. Chances are he’s got an explanation and good reason for not getting back to you.
Doesn’t Add Up – This doesn’t make sense if the guy leaves you in limbo for weeks or months then tries to tell you he was busy. How busy could he really be? If he was seriously too busy to take a few seconds to message you, there’s really no excuse for that.
The Meaning – If you are questioning the first situation, you likely have nothing to worry about. He’s likely just busy, and you shouldn’t read anything more into it. Life is busy, and it happens.
Truth – When a guy is really interested in you and he can’t text you back right away, he will make sure he does when he has a minute, and it will come with an explanation. You shouldn’t have to ask him for one.
The Guy Is Taking A Step Back Because It’s Getting Too Serious Too Fast
Makes Sense – Relationships move at different speeds. If you are getting really close to this guy, and the serious texts have started, he might be backing off on the texts because he’s afraid of all the emotions that have developed.
Doesn’t Add Up – Some men are cowards, and if he just stops replying to your texts, he’s likely gone for good. Sorry about that, but in time, you will see, the sooner you figure this out, the better.
Truth – Guys can be really weird, particularly when they aren’t sure what they want. Men often text a girl they kind of like but don’t want to get in too deep because they aren’t serious about her. Gents don’t always say what’s on their mind, and if they feel like things are moving too quickly, they might send you a signal by laying off with the texts.
Don’t ignore this hint, or you will push him right out of your life.
He’s Just Not Interested and Hopes You Will Catch On
Makes Sense – This adds up when he doesn’t message you back, or he does but only with a disinterested, weird, one-word answer. Exactly the type of text message that makes you want to pull out your hair. Talk about frustrating!
Doesn’t Add Up – More than likely, this isn’t the case if the guy eventually replies and apologizes, at least acting like he likes you. If he keeps putting in the effort, this likely isn’t the reason he’s not replying on occasion.
Truth – When a guy just stops texting you or replying to your messages or gives silly one-word answers, it’s a pretty clear indicator he’s not interested in you anymore. Perhaps, he just doesn’t want to say it. Many guys drop the hint and hope you are the one that figures it out and moves on. Cheesy but you always need to keep this reasoning in mind.
Braindead
Makes Sense – When a guy doesn’t reply to your texts for a few hours or a day then suddenly sends you a message apologizing for not getting back to you, this can sort-of make sense.
Doesn’t Add Up – If he goes for long periods of time, like days, weeks, or months, without replying, and then suddenly, he replies telling you he’s been such a jerk, you know he’s a big fat liar.
Truth – Some guys like to play it cool and don’t want to be too eager when it comes to replying to texts. It’s understandable that, sometimes, he might actually forget to reply. Keep your mind open because, if he happens to take a while to text you back and it comes with an apology, it might be true.
Keep in mind, if you like someone, texting is usually somewhat of a priority.
He’s Got Another Hottie
Makes Sense – When a guy rarely answers your texts and then suddenly stops cold, he’s probably into another girl.
Doesn’t Add Up – This is tough because there are many ways it makes total sense.
Truth – This one is pretty straightforward. When a man seemingly stops texting out of the blue, he could very well have another girl in his life. If you really want to know, you can ask him or take a gander at his social media platforms. That may be a little sneaky, but you deserve to know the truth.
This Guy Is Playing Ghost
Makes Sense – This is when he completely stops texting you, disappears, and you have no clue why.
Doesn’t Add Up – It certainly won’t make sense if suddenly he tries to start texting you again.
Truth – Truth be told, ghosting really does suck. Usually, this means he isn’t into you anymore but doesn’t have the guts to tell you. So, he hides behind his phone and pretends he doesn’t know you. Sometimes, the truth just hurts.
He’s at A Loss for Words
Makes Sense – When he stops replying during a conversation because it got boring or he didn’t bother signing off properly.
Doesn’t Add Up – When a guy goes days, weeks, or months without replying to any texts.
Truth – Sometimes, the words just don’t come, and a text conversation just stops because nobody has anything left to say. It makes sense this could happen, and he decides to say nothing. If he finally shoots you a text, it might mean he really didn’t know what to say.
Of course, if he doesn’t ever text you back, you know what that means. It’s time for you to move on.
He Sucks at Texting
Makes Sense – Some guys just aren’t born to text. This makes sense if he doesn’t have any personality with his texts and he follows this with a message telling you how much he hates texting.
Doesn’t Add Up – He never messages you again.
Truth – This may be difficult for you to understand, but some people have a very hard time texting. If the guy you’re interested in seems to be good in all other areas but has technical issues with texting, he could really like you. He might need a little time to work on his texting.
What should you do when he stops texting you?
When it comes to dating, one of the most frustrating things is when you are conversing with a man, and suddenly, he vanishes into thin air. He might stop texting or tell you he will give you a shout and doesn’t.
This situation is challenging, to say the least, and it’s tough to figure out beyond the shadow of a doubt why he’s not texting you back. Here are a few pointers you should do if you find yourself with a guy who’s not texting you back.
Don’t Go Nuts with The Messages
One of the worst things you can do is flood him with text messages when he’s not replying. The easiest route to push a guy away is to pummel him with message after message when he hasn’t gotten around to answering the first one you sent.
It’s hard to move forward without any replies, but you need to make sure you don’t come off as desperate. Machine gun texting makes you look desperate and, frankly, a little crazy. Don’t do it, please!
It’s OK to Shoot Him A Casual Text
There’s nothing wrong with reaching out to him a couple times to see what he’s up to. That’s neither desperate nor out of line. If this guy tells you he’s going to reply and doesn’t or just doesn’t bother messaging you back within 2-3 days, you need to consider the fact he doesn’t like you anymore.
Don’t get angry or mad and don’t try to get demanding with him. Act like it’s no big deal and move on.
If You Can Have A Face to Face
Sometimes, this is impossible, but if you have the opportunity to see him in person, that’s the quickest route to figure out what’s going on. Body language is up to 80 percent of communication. When you find yourself in his presence, you will be able to read through his body language and mannerisms whether or not he is into you.
Men are visual creatures, so seeing you up close will remind him how much he really wants to be with you.
Be Very Careful Who You Whine To
It makes sense you’re likely going to be frustrated and upset with the lack of texting. Make sure you are very careful who you are whining to about your frustrations. The last thing you want to do is complain to someone who knows this guy you are interested in.
People seem to love drama, and when you are yapping to the wrong people, you risk the chance of them blowing your concerns out of the water. Guys don’t like drama, so this will never end well for you.
Stay safe and only vent to the people you know you can trust. Leave the random strangers out of the equation.
Stay Away from Social Media
This one seems to get me into trouble on occasion. You don’t need to make this public. Really, it’s between you and the guy and maybe a few close friends if need be. Refrain from posting nasty messages you will soon regret.
In the heated moment, you might think this will give him a nice dose of his own medicine, but you’re wrong. Emotions and logic can’t mix.
Steer clear of turning him off completely. Don’t post anything about this on any social media platform, and you’re doing the mature thing.
Never Sit and Wait
There’s nothing fun about a guy blowing you off. However, no matter how much you “think” you want his attention, you need to step back and get busy. Don’t wait around for him to come to his senses.
Don’t stay home on the weekend just in case he calls. You need to get out there and enjoy life. If he texts you, he texts you; deal with it then.
Cut the String and Focus Forward
There comes a time when you need to cut your losses and move forward. If he’s not texting you and seems to have disappeared off the planet, you need to swallow your pride and let it go.
When you stop giving a man attention and get on with your life, that’s when they usually come to their senses and try to get back into your life. This is when the ball is in your court, exactly where you want it.
If he’s not giving you his time, then he’s not worth your time. Fair’s fair in love and war.
Here are more real reasons men don’t text women back: The Dos and the Don’ts
Some Gals Get Creepy
There are times when girls just get creepy when they are texting. Maybe it’s because they can hide behind their electronic device, and they don’t have to say it to his face. Some girls get overly bold and perhaps a little over the top with their confidence.
For example, when a girl he hardly knows shoots him a dirty text, it’s both slutty and creepy. Talk about a little too strong in the “get to know each other” phase.
This move can put the guy on the spot, and what the beep is he supposed to text back to something like that?
Too Tough to Figure Out What She Means
When you are in front of a person, you can figure out pretty clearly what they are trying to say. With texting, it couldn’t be more confusing. The communication is much clearer when you can read the body signals of the person.
With text messaging, everyone has their own style, and it’s difficult for the guy to pick up on what you mean, sometimes. Are you trying to be funny or sarcastic? Are you pissed off or slightly annoyed?
It’s all about assumptive guessing when it comes to texting, and that’s never a good thing. Sometimes, a simple conversation turns into a mountain of trouble.
This frustrates guys and, sometimes, pushes them to a point where they are tired of trying to figure it out.
Their solution is to stop texting.
It’s Simply the Other Way Around
Some men, no matter how busy they are, will always text a girl back. It’s all about manners and respect. If the girl isn’t extending the same courtesy, this can be enough to make a guy not want to text back.
Waiting Until Morning Isn’t A Bad Thing
A good rule of thumb for guys to keep them out of trouble is never to reply to a late-night text message. Of course, there are exceptions to the rule, like if it’s a certified girlfriend or family member.
Smart men stay away from girls that text in the wee hours of the morning because chances are she’s out with a couple girlfriends, loaded. Nobody thinks straight when they’ve been out drinking, and that’s no way to start a meaningful relationship.
It’s not like these guys are looking to piss the girl off. They just want to keep it safe and wait until morning to text back. Sounds pretty logical to me.
She Lacks Attention
Guys love texting back and forth with a cute girl. When the conversation is interesting, and the monotone stuff is left at the door, it’s a good thing.
The issue arises when a girl starts leaving the personal out of it. So, it’s easy for the guy to pick up on the fact she’s doing a million other things while she’s texting. Men like attention, and they like to think that the girl they are into is focused only on him for the short time they are messaging back and forth.
The last thing a man wants is to feel like he’s making a girl feel obligated to him. There’s got to be the want, or he will simply stop texting.
Rules That Stick
Some guys were brought up in a household that had rules when it comes to what you can and can’t do when family or friends are present. For me, I was never allowed to have my phone at the table or with me when I was engaging with the family. If we were out at a restaurant or at someone’s house watching a movie, the phones were nowhere to be seen.
Many gals get ticked when they don’t get a message back. They need to take a chill pill because there is more to life than texting.
When She Doesn’t Get Him – That’s a Total Turnoff
There are some people with whom you just click. They know what you mean with your texting and are usually bang on. That makes texting back and forth exciting and interested. However, there are times when a girl just doesn’t get a guy, and the texting isn’t being read correctly. That’s a total turnoff for the guy because it’s not fun when you aren’t being appreciated and understood.
Mistake Text Messaging
There are times when guys get random texts from girls that make no sense. When a guy gets a mistake text, it’s cause for concern, particularly if the content in the text is disturbing.
This puts the man in a weird spot because he’s not sure if he should reply. Often, this is enough to push him into the no text zone because he doesn’t like feeling like a fish out of water. Who can blame him?
Anxiety Kicks In
Many guys suffer from some degree of anxiety, and that interferes with the normal texting pattern between a girl and a guy. The pressure to text back can be overwhelming, particularly if the girl he is texting just can’t stop.
Final Words
This is a subjective question. There are many reasons he is ignoring your texts all of a sudden. Use the tips, signals, and pointers and, of course, your gut to dig deep and find the true causal factors in your situation.
When you’ve got the facts in front of you, only then do you have the power to make the best choices. Perhaps, he’s innocent and you can move forward with him. Otherwise, you might have to kick him to the curb and find that guy who thinks you are worth the time to text quick replies.
Josephina Cookie says
What are some text messages I can send that will earn more interest form him or what is something i can say after he hasn’t responded after a couple of days (he texts me pretty consistently, until this last text)?
Valentina says
Delete him and forget him… It is too painfully embarrassing and it shows me that he doesn’t care. Don’t give a f*ck. I’m going to have a bit of wine and look for a new job and a new relocation so that I can move on. He might come around by texting or create a new Facebook account to reach me desperately but then look less attractive because he hurt me. That is it. I am over it.
Y says
I’m always confused. I didn’t think he was interested. Then we started seeing each other. He seems kind of ‘aloof’ but kisses me goodbye every time. I’ve had a minor chat, just stating a presence (set the tone of ‘balance’). I was worried it might cause a slight regression cause it’s so brand new. But I asked him outright if he was going to take some leadership with planning outings or suggesting places & events. I didn’t want to seem like I’m ‘domineering’; similarly with ‘texting’ & calling. It seems I always take the initiative. Turns out he’s laid back. Says he’s totally fine with me doing things & he’ll go along. I would ordinarily find that annoying but I inherently trust. Initially he’s always told me to call or text him anytime. He went from replying almost immediately to now there’s 2-3 days in between & he answers when I prompt him. I’m trying NOT to message & just let it be…example: I said ‘movie night & chill’, left it wide open to when & where cause we’d just been together. He seems to be ok with getting together every few days (though he’s very busy right now with his son & family matters despite being ‘off’ work for months [medical leave for preventative cancer surgery. Detected last September as pre-advanced cancer]. I am flattered he’s fit me in at all. I’m no pressure & he seemed very much like he’s going to visit on Wednesday. But there’s not been a PEEP since I texted what he’d like for dinner Wednesday. So, idk if I’m being presumptious to think it’s a sure thing for Wednesday or he might not show at all & not text to say one way or the other. Thats’ what I have a hard time being patient about..though the BEAT goes on!! I don’t sit around & wait.
Valentina says
I’ve been talking to this guy since the first day I saw him I couldn’t stop thinking about him . I don’t know what happened to me but I confessed what I felt for him and last Wednesday he came over and we almost kissed but than he kept rejecting the kiss and since than he completely stopped talking to me and I feel like garbage . I keep texting him and he doesn’t respond me. I don’t know what is going on but he is acting really weird.
Joss says
Before my boyfriend stop reply me back, the day before yesterday we were talking about a subject together, he wanted me to design a business card for his cousin and we did together.
we are in long distance relationship so we text or send messages to each other everyday even sometime was in a short conversation but still message each other every day.
So this is the second time he stop messages me in suddenly that I’m still don’t know how to deal with, so I only send some care messages or asking if something I said make him upset, he could straightforward. Then he only read didn’t reply any back.
I should stop message him just let him alone until he want to talked again,right?
M says
I’ve been seeing this guy for the past 5 months now. We met at university where we close by, nothing happened between us, we texted for about a week and the conversation came to a natural close and stopped. A year passed and he got back in contact though we are now 4 hours away from each other. I had at this point decided to stop dating as I had had a string of bad dates and wanted to take time out for myself so when he got back in contact I was weary of replying in fear this would go the same way as every other guy, I was finally happy being single but I decided to reply anyway. We talked almost constantly everyday for 2 months before meeting again as both of us had very busy schedules but managed to keep in regular contact despite this. Our first date was amazing, he planned everything and I had a great weekend with him, we clicked and talked non-stop about everything from family to marriage and kids (not our kids necessarily). After I left we were still in regular contact and met up for another weekend together, he booked the hotel and sorted everything. We were still in regular contact after this and by this time it had been about 4 months. Then after a week, contact started to drop off, he’d go hours, sometimes a whole day without replying to my messages but still Snapchatting me. We met up a third time and again it was great though he seemed a little more lax in making plans. He now 5 months in will often leave my messages for 4 days before replying without acknowledging it. I talked to him about it and he alluded to thinking it was okay as he was talking to me on another social media platform (Snapchat) which I don’t agree with. I thought he was trying to fade me out slowly as he was no longer interested so I told him if he didn’t want to talk anymore that that was okay but he said he wanted to continue talking. Even now his replies leave a lot to be desired. I am not working at the moment so I guess I notice his replies – or lack thereof – more than I would have done before. Sometimes he puts lots of effort into replying but more often than not he won’t even ask me how my day has gone. I get that he’s incredibly busy with exams and so on (he does medicine) but it feels as if he doesn’t care at all. I’m not needy but I don’t think regular contact – especially as we don’t see each other more than once every few weeks – is asking for a lot,
R says
I’m on a vacation right now, and I’ve been trying to get ahold of him, but he hasn’t texted me/answered me in at least 6 days. What do I do? I still like him, but I have NO CLUE how to deal with the situation. HELP!!!!
jen says
when i was in high school. my parents were best friends with this guy’s parents. So we basically grew up together. He had a girlfriend who went to a different school. We lost contact when he joined the marines when he graduated high school. A couple years ago, he found me on fb, and would chat from time to time. Our chats were not lengthy, just for a few minutes. His present job has him traveling 320 days out the year to various states installing conveyor systems in warehouses. A few weeks ago, he texted said he was going to be in my area and would like to see me. I was going to blow him off due to since high school 40 years ago, i gained a lot of weight. Against my better judgement i met him. when he seen me he kept hugging and kissing me. he offered for me to stay the night since I had a 40 mile drive back home. I did not stay overnight but we did have some hot sex. Since this time i have sent him a couple texts with no response except for a thumbs up. what is going on with him? was he repulsed by me?
Sandra Wagner says
I haven’t met this guy yet in person. But we have common ground. We both agreed we may have seen each other publicly. We’ve been texting back & forth for 5 months. 1 day he told me he is dating to woman & he gave me there names. So, I asked ah you do have a girlfriend. He said, no ex girlfriend just dating. I made suggestion maybe he should move closer to his parents. I found out he was thinking about it & was thinking about moving to town near me. We were planning on meeting for the 1st time in Feb.2020. Then his last text was 24 hours I did not text during this time. Did I loose him for good since we have no relationship? Prior to this about a week ago. I told him we’ve been getting along in our text, we may have more in common than we admit after I told him I’m not seeing anyone. I told him I think our relationship is but flirting back in forth on the phone about the other guy because he asked me if I was dating. After I became courageous about him & I getting along. He said, your right, let’s meet on Feb. 8th that evening he would be in town at a conference. He told me he was going home to his parents because of his Dads Birthday the end of Jan. I said, tell him Happy Birthday! Then said, it was actually his brothers b-day. Then I told him tell them both happy birthday. He said. He would. I mentioned I remember when his b-day Feb 4, Same time as my niece. He said, that is correct. I told him I wanted to celebrate his birthday with him. He mentioned that would be wonderful. Now this. Have I lost him for good since We’re not in relationship? Should I give him a little text like I thought we were communicating well why all the silence ? Now or waite 48 hours. Just move on?
Kathleen says
My ex reached out to me recently and was all full on with me apologetic wanted to meet stuff like that.
Now I haven’t heard from him in 5 days it’s like his completely disappeared.
Not sure what had happened. Not sure if I came across too much I really don’t know or his busy in his new work place. Was hoping to meet him for some drinks but don’t really want to reach out and look needy?