There are always statistics floating around about how many people start a relationship at work. I’ve heard everything from 30% to 70%. It doesn’t really matter the percentage. Work is an easy way to meet a woman who has some of the same interests you do, and it offers a great way to see the woman you like every day.
And if you are interested in long-term romance, then this article says that couples who meet at work are more likely to get married.
How To Approach A Woman At Work
I met my husband at work, and I think the way he approached me was pretty typical of how you should do it without looking like a creep or desperate. So, that is the approach we are going to talk about here.
Other people may suggest something different – but remember, we met at work over 15 years ago and we are still together and happy. That has to count for something.
His First Approach At Work
He approached me on my break, which happened to coincide with his. He basically sat near me and started a conversation.
Did I find it weird? Kind of because we had never talked before. But at the same time, when we had to go back to work, I found myself thinking about him in a good way.
Our conversation was a little bit about work and a little bit about our personal lives. Nothing heavy.
Some important things to note where that:
- He was polite
- He asked questions about me
- He shared some information about himself
- He made me laugh
All of these things made the first conversation positive in my mind.
After that I was always wondering where he was, what he was doing, and whether he would come talk to me again.
Here’s the lesson: When you approach a woman at work and start a normal conversation, nothing seems overly weird or off about it, but you are working yourself into her awareness. Instead of her just being focused on work and the annoying co-workers she works with, she will also think about you – the guy that came up to her and talked to her like a normal human being. The guy that showed some interest in her.
After Your Initial Approach
Now she is thinking about you.
- She is wondering if you are going to talk to her again
- She is wondering what you think of her and why you approached her in the first place
- She is curious about you
These are all good things. They will keep you in her mind as she goes through her workday and even as she goes about her life.
Don’t wait too long to approach her again. If you wait too long, she will think you were just keeping yourself occupied during that one break and it was meaningless. When she believes that, she could protect herself from getting hurt (because she likes you more than you like her) by taking you off the potential date list, and you may lose a chance to win a date with her if she really sees you as a threat to her emotions.
Your second conversation should be like the first. Talk about some work things, add in some personal things, and then end it politely.
After The Second Approach You Can Do What Feels Right
There is no right way to move forward after this. You have approached her, talked to her, and got her interest. There is no set time to ask her out after this point – it should be done when it feels right to you.
But, again, don’t take too long or she will put up her defenses. That’s the important thing to remember.
Michael Gregory II says
It’s funny you posted this because I was sort of wondering about that question the other day. Thanks! I suppose one of the tricks is simply getting under her radar.
Bellaisa says
Yeah, when there are tons of guys walking around in an environment where relationships are not your first priority, getting in her mind helps a lot. 🙂 Thanks for stopping by and commenting.
Max says
Wow, you’re really kind. Thank you for this. I’d just be happy if she thinks about me at all after the initial approach. I have had a hard time making small talk with anybody in this world. I just can’t do it. I’ll try though. Wish me luck. 🙂
Patrick Doucet says
Ok so heres my situation, how do i approach her if we kinda talk, but its just fleeting little moments here and there. Nothing major, no infor about either of us going back and forth. Shes realy cute and i would love to ask her out. Just havnt had the greatest luck ever so k ne ed some pointers
jack says
patrick, go with your heart, if its telling you to do something its telling you for a reason, im in the same boat as you but you know what ? im just gonna go for it. Theres either 2 answer yes or no.
Devon says
The girl I’m interested sits in the same spot every day i pass her desk every time i go to the bathroom or get a drink. We’ve shared glances and today i saw her and she happens to look at me as i was passing her and i just smiled a genuine smile at her and she gave me one back it was nice. But since I’m at a call center i can’t just go up to her and start a conversation cuz she is on the phone. I’m thinking about sitting close by her tomorrow. But i don’t wanna be a creep and just give her my number as I’m passing her i wanna get to know her first. Anything helps with finding courage to just go up at y’all her??
Sarange says
I work at a call center too… sit like one sit opposite from her where you can both watch each other it will make her super horn you for you
Rich says
I have a crush on a young lady where I work. I see her here and there not that often though. When I see her It is small talk how are you etc.. When i see her again should I just go in for the kill and ask her out on a date or thats too soon?
Rs says
I have a situation. There is this girl at my work and something about her I find myself looking at her whenever I can..I try to keep to a minimal as to not come off creepy but omg cant help it lol..I cant seem to find a way to approach her..now here last few days I have noticed she has been looking at me also or she looking thru me idk but I want to talk to her..heres my issue..I speak English and she does not..she speak Spanish.
Al says
I really enjoyed reading this article! I’m in the same situation with one of the desk girls at my workplace. Although as of late, I find myself spending less time with her due to the demands of my position and I’m starting to get “butterflies in my stomach” in a way whenever she’s around. I find her to be a very sweet and cute girl I’d like to see if there’s something there. What do you guys think I should do?