“We can still be friends.” That is one of the hardest things to hear after someone has broken up with you, and in the moment it can be very hard to respond to, especially if you don’t want to be friends, and you want to be back in a relationship, having sex and having fun, and doing much more than what friends do together.
If she is saying, “We can still be friends,” then your chances of winning her back are very slim.
The thing to remember is that if you are hearing ‘we can still be friends’, then the woman breaking up with you is saying this for a reason that pertains to herself. She is hoping that you will still be friends, but that doesn’t mean that you have to want to be friends, and it doesn’t mean she won’t let you go from her life.
Why A Woman Will Give You The Friend Line
There are two main reasons a woman will say this:
1. If a woman does not want to be in a relationship with you anymore, but does not want to lose you from her life, she will give you this line. She has decided that, romantically, things are not working out, but she loves you as a person and she can’t bear the thought of losing you from her life.
2. She has tried breaking up with you before but you will not let it happen. She doesn’t want to lose you either, so she has decided to give you an option where she is still in your life, just not in a romantic way. It lets you know that she is serious about not being together romantically anymore and, she hopes, makes it easier for you to let go of her in that way.
The Good And Bad To Hearing The Friend Line
The positive of hearing ‘we can still be friends’ is that you are not going to lose her from your life – if you don’t want to. You get to decide if you want to be friends with her or not. In short, you have all the power to determine where your relationship will go with her and whether you want to continue a friend type of relationship with her.
The negative of hearing this line is that you have almost zero chances of winning her back. If she views you as a friend after you have dated, then getting out of the friend zone is not going to be easy. She already tried to have a romantic relationship with you and it didn’t work. She will remember that as you try to win her back. Moreover, if she has lost that romantic feeling towards you, then her attraction and desire has dwindled, and that does not work in your favor – AT ALL!
Why You May Want To Skip The Friend Part And Take A Break
Even if you want to be friends with her, it is a good idea to take a break from her. It is going to be very hard to watch her move on with her life. She will be in a completely different state of mind than you are (she has already decided you are only friends), and you will feel anger, sadness, jealousy, etc.
You will have a hard time moving on with your life as you deal with these negative emotions. It is better to put some space in between the two of you, allow your emotions to cool off, start moving forward to a future without her, and THEN add her back into your life as a friend – if you want to.
The thing to remember is that it is not her choice. She gave you the option to still be friends, but if you can’t handle the thought of that, then the healthier option is to take a break. The chances of winning her back are very, very slim anyways, and your happiness and health should be your number one focus at this point.
Will She Want Me Back If We Take A Break?
Ironically, your best chance at getting her back into your life would be to take a break and put distance between the two of you. Giving her distance from you may help her realize what a great guy you are and how much you mean to her.
I don’t say this so that you can take a break and sit around hoping she will come back to you. There is still a very small chance that this will happen, and you should work on moving forward towards a life without her as a romantic partner when you take a break. I just want you to know that there is a possibility it could happen.
If she does happen to come back to you, and you want her back, then great! But you never know – as you move forward you may realize that breaking up with her was a good thing for YOU and your happiness.
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