How to court a woman sounds like we’re back in the dark ages where men actually put the effort into focusing in on one girl and devising a plan over time, months, and sometimes years, to woo her. A far cry from today’s online dating world, where the goal seems to be to test out all the fish in the sea. After which you’re so confused on what you really want that you continuously throw really great women back into the sea and keep trying a different flavor; a pattern that will literally continue until you’re old and gray, fat and ugly.
Sound familiar?
Experts from selfgrowth.com say it often happens when you least expect it. Your eyes meet, your heart flutters, and you’re already brainstorming the quickest route to win her over.
The next question is should you court or date this woman? Is there a difference?
Back in the day a man needed to court a virgin woman for months or years before getting the permission from her father to marry her. After they were married they were allowed to have sex and sleep in the same bed. Today when you are courting a woman you’ve got to “show” her you are an advantage to her. That you don’t make her life more complicated and that you can make it easier and less stressful. Otherwise what does she need “you” for? Think about it.
Experts from themodernman.com report more than 55% of U.S. couples admit to having sex on the first date. In our world today, intercourse happens super fast. Kind of makes sense that something is lost right off the hop. Where’s the mystery? There’s little opportunity for the mind to wander and create an intensity and desire that heightens with time, strengthening the bond based on quality time, and getting to know each other.
Here Are A Few Rock Solid Steps To A Successful Courtship In Modern Day
Create an intense sexual vibe
In ancient days, the goal of the man was to prove to the girl and her parents that he could provide. Boys are supposed to be the providers. In the now, girls often select a man based on how he made her feel sexually. If she felt attracted to him, he was in the good books. Think of the sex on the first date as a test drive to see if he’s what she wants or not. You’ve still got to show her your traditional side, that you can provide, but the physical attraction vibe is ultimately on the table; literally.
She’s not normally looking to settle down right away. With a little time, she will decide how serious she wants to get with the guy. She may just want to date awhile, be a couple for a year or two and break up, or maybe get engaged and see if she still likes the idea of forever with you.
Quickly create an intimate physical contact
When you are courting a woman, don’t make the mistake of wasting too much time dating before you hop in the sac. If you wait, your girl’s going to go out with her girlfriends and sleep with the first guy she meets. Nowadays, intimacy is often the start of the relationship. If she likes it, you will be forgotten fast.
Better treat her like a very special lady
If you really want this girl forever, you better make sure you to treat her like your future wife. Make sure she knows that she’s just not another girl you’re dating. If she feels that way, you can kiss her good-bye.
When you’ve had that talk about getting serious, you better make sure you get rid of any other chics you’re still dating on the side. She will find out.
Move it or lose it to the next level
As you move forward in your relationship, you either keep moving full steam ahead through the 5 relationship stages and head toward marriage, or you don’t. It’s pretty common to have a committed couple against marriage but willing to move forward by moving in together and starting a family.
However, if you are serious about courting her, you need to find your way through the relationship stages and into marriage. Otherwise, you will eventually get bored and if you don’t have at least that sacred bond of marriage, it’s just too easy to throw in the towel, according to Psychology Today relationship specialists. This stuff needs to be discussed to make it real.
What many people fail to realize is with the right partner and dual intentions, marriage just takes you level of commitment, togetherness, and closeness to the highest ground. Your love and respect for each other will continue to grow and bring magic with it.
If you think marriage is a trap, a life sentence of nagging, fighting, and continuous sacrifice, then you’re either with the wrong girl or you’ve got your head screwed on backwards.
Be yourself and show your girl how truly special she is every day, and if it’s meant to b,e it will be.
It may be much easier just to seduce the girl and see where it takes you?
How To Seduce Your Girl
No doubt, if you want to be successful at seducing a woman, you need to understand that ultimately it’s her decisions whether she wants to be intimate with you or not. If she isn’t feeling it and her brain isn’t telling her she wants you too, it’s never going to happen.
Deduction Initiatives Baltimore Group are the professionals when it comes to seduction 101. The main misconception around seduction is that most men believe they must only focus on sexual attraction to successfully seduce a woman. That’s nonsense. Of course, this is important but it’s not just about the sex.
If you’re a guy and you believe it’s all about the sex, I bet my right arm you’re not getting much of it. You likely talk the talk but can’t walk the walk afterward. Fact is, female and male seduction are like Venus and Mars, completely different.
Relationship gurus have some tried, tested, and proven tactics to become a master seducer with the woman you want in your bed.
Boast the alpha male
Your alpha male ingrained traits are calm, secure, confident but not arrogant, and fun. Use these to help you seduce a woman. Toss those cheesy pickup lines out the window and tap into your intrinsic male traits. That’s what’s crazy powerful; that’s what women really want.
Your goal is to set up the platform for her to create a super hot and strong image of you in her mind that will be etched in stone. Then her imagination can have fun with the rest. This is called “fractionation” if you want to get technical.
Body language is powerful
Communication is both visual and auditory. What you say and your body language is important in speeding up the seduction process. In fact, your body language is more powerful than what you say. Seeing is believing. You are looking to create an emotional connection that’s intimidate and real; which can only be done via body language.
Try the traditional “push-pull” technique
The first time you are talking with her, you need to push forward aggressively with both your body language and your words. Make it crystal clear she is the only thing on your mind, but make sure you don’t make her feel cheap. That will get you kicked out the door pronto.
Then you’ve got to pull back a little and leave her wanting more. This is the only way she will recognize that she likes what she was hearing and seeing and really does want you. A natural trigger for her to get aggressive and show you how much she wants to be in your mind and bed.
Create your solid connection
In order for seduction to be successful, you must build a solid trusted connection from the start. When you talk, you’ve got to give up some personal information that makes her feel connected and special. Show some of your vulnerabilities so she learns to open herself to you and want more. This technique naturally creates the need for more.
Keep the subjects safe. Don’t talk about your exes because emotions and logic don’t know each other and you just never know when your illogical emotions are going to take over; and who knows where that will take you fast. The best route is to throw the questions at her and get her talking. When she asks you a question and you’re not sure how to answer, just reword it and throw a slider back at her. From her answer, you can create your response. So she hears what she wants to hear, not necessarily what you want to say. Awareness is everything.
Learn where her emotional buttons are and use them to deepen your connection. Listen to what she has to say and it shouldn’t be that difficult.
Mesmerize her with your words
What you are looking to do here is create an instantaneous emotional connection. You don’t have to worry about layered conversation where you’ve got to tax your brain, remembering the details of her past, what she likes, doesn’t like, and everything she has said to you from day one.
It’s really quite simple because all you’ve got do do is insert your magical, hypnotic words into your natural conversations. Distract her with a certain conversation and use the words that draw her into you emotionally. It’s fast and effective and totally works when you do it right.
So if she’s passionate about her puppy, get her first talking about her puppy. Then start relating with her. Tell her you understand, that you had a puppy just like hers, and that you’d love to hear more about her puppy. Create that emotional bond around her interests and the trust factor is a given. Super easy to do and so highly effective.
Keep the mystery alive
You are seriously brain dead if you don’t know that women thrive on mystery and love anticipation and passion. This means you shouldn’t give up too much of yourself or you might dig yourself into a deep hole of disappointment just because the mind is an incredibly powerful thing.
Be sure to make her focus on you and keep her attention on you controlled and factual; don’t let it get out of hand. Ever wonder why the hot chics seem to lose interest in you before you can get them into bed? It’s because they learn too much about you too quickly. You’re too easy to read and this means there’s a huge void in the mystery and adventure department.
You aren’t going to be successful in the world of seduction if you don’t keep a little mystery alive.
Keep the poll position
The last thing you want to do when you’re looking to seduce a woman is to let her take charge. You’ve got to keep things irrational because that’s just what women want. The master seducers of the world know how to get inside a woman’s brain and connect immediately on a deep emotional level. Get her doing things she normally wouldn’t do and you know you’ve hooked her good.
Hide your interest in her
Fact is, women use their gut intuition to know whether or not a guy is interested in her. Usually they are right on. This is a disadvantage to the guy trying to seduce because if a girl knows you want her, you’ve just put her in the driver’s seat. Not a good thing.
You’ve got to hide your intentions enough so that she’s left wondering if you really like her or not. What this does is pique her interest and work to naturally increase her drive to want you more. Everyone naturally wants what they don’t have right? Well if she isn’t sure whether or not she “has” you, then you are back running the show and that’s just how it has to be if you’re going to be successful in seduction.
Pay her compliments
Be very careful with this one. But experts from Psychology Today suggest that you will open the door for emotional connection when you tell a girl something you love about her. Everyone likes to hear a compliment and when you balance this with the information you are gathering about her, you will have the tools you need to seduce with success so you can take action and get her into your bed. Nice thought isn’t it?
You may also like our article: Chemistry and Science Pick Up Lines.
What Do Women Really Want?
Ah, the million dollar question men would pay big bucks to know the answer to. Unfortunately, boys, it’s really not that easy. But don’t give up because there are lots of pointers that are going to steer you in the right direction to ultimately figuring out what a woman wants and how to give it to her.
The gurus from askmen.com seem to have a pretty good handle on the subject.
It’s tough to make the connection between what women really want from the behaviors they do. The most important factor here is to understand that although women share some of the same genetic traits and definitely different versions of the same anatomy, they are each truly unique and very different. In other words, rinse and repeat does not apply.
The knowledge you have is your power – The only way you are ever going to know women is to better understand them. This doesn’t mean you just need to know what she likes in her coffee and what restaurant she prefers. That’s too easy. You’ve got to dig deeper to capture her attention. Understand her moods and tastes, her temperament and what makes her smile. Learn how to wow her and surprise her just to open new doors. This is a full-time, daily and forever job. But if you really want to give a woman what she wants, you’re going to do it with a smile.
Your job is to bend to her needs just enough to let her know you are paying attention. This doesn’t mean you’ve got to loose your macho manly sexiness and become a slave to her. Don’t compromise your masculinity. But you’ve got to maintain your “yin” and figure out her “yang” if you’re going to be successful.
Uncover the magical mystery of the woman – There’s no doubt women are mysterious creatures. You can see this as creepy mysterious or alluring mysterious. Think of this like a game. Women want to play and if you want to succeed you’ve got no choice but to put your bet on the table and go for it. Get set to be sharp, intuitive, and extremely patient.
Every woman has feminine mystique. This gives them the innate secrecy they need to feel sexy and attractive, alive and wanted. Not to mention the fact it keeps every man on his toes for life. I see this as a power card and if you want the girl, you have no choice but to call her on it.
Of course, this can be extremely frustrating and that’s why so many don’t succeed at this part and ultimately never get the girl. Keep it in a positive light and you are closer to winning the battle. Let’s say, you like a girl that is open book without walls. Then you must accept the fact this strong woman will demand more effort from you if you want the key to discover her deeply buried precious inner assets. There is special hidden beneath the layers.
The cat and dog game can be tiring but in the end it’s ultimately rewarding. Do you want the first peach you see or the sweetest juiciest peach on the tree? It’s a choice.
Beware of the dark side – It’s important that you tread gently around the the dark side of the woman. You just don’t know what lurks behind those doors and it’s usually best you don’t find out. Just pay attention to her cues. Is she giving you the green light to dig deeper? Or is she shouting out for you to stop now or face her wrath? These are signals that really can’t be taught, you just have to have your conscious mind open to recognize them and take your lead from them.
Don’t make a wrong turn on her or you may go running out the door with your tail wagging behind you.
Learn to read her, adopt her thinking, and then react – If you understand what these three words really mean, you will be able to navigate yourself around the landmines that are intertwined within her soul. You can never avoid them altogether but losing half a leg is much better than getting your face blown off.
It’s always wise to start by being yourself but if you really want a woman, there are times you’re going to have to shift into acting mode and become what she wants you to be. Never an easy feat.
She may be in a mood where you need to pick up on the signals that she doesn’t want you to be your usual “solution” oriented guy, rather you need to play a little dumb and just let her work through the mood. In other words, she really doesn’t want the answers right now; maybe later but not in the moment.
And if you can’t pick up on these cues, you’re either ignorant or you aren’t looking closely enough. Your job is to figure out what role she wants you to assume and take your position. Sometimes, she might want you in the power position and other times you might better hold back and get submissive fast. The better you become mastering this technique, the better your shot at landing your lady.
Figure out the blueprint for intimacy – This one is never going to be easy because women always want different. Sometimes they’re going to want more and sometimes less. One day, they may want you to take the lead and the next expect you to push her buttons.
One size doesn’t fit all; remember that.
If you believe for one second that every glance, comment or gesture is intended to get you aroused, you might as well hop back on your spaceship and blast off. Chill and check yourself at the door.
Sure, you might get hard thinking about grabbing her by the hair and dragging her back into the cave to have your way, but trust me, you’re going to get a heck of a lot further teasing and flirting with her. In the right amount, she till ultimately wants to show you what she wants, which makes it all super easy. Give her the opportunity to know you on the head with her club.
More is not better boys; just in case you needed that information before you hop onto your ship to blast off.
Fact is, the woman’s hunger for sex is much stronger than a man’s. But because it has much more meaning, there’s no direct route to it; time, focus, diversity, and understanding, are the only keys that will get you in.
How to court a woman is no easy feat but when you make the time to understand all aspects of getting the woman you want, you’ve got the tools to figure out the combination lock. Good luck with that and let the strongest man win.
References:
https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/finding-cloud9/201305/10-dating-dos-and-donts-6-therapists
http://www.psychologistsline.com/2016/05/06/on-line-dating-tips-for-males-from-girls/
http://www.seducewithpersonality.com/the-key-to-seduce-women/
http://www.nytimes.com/2013/06/16/books/
