It’s truly important you know what you want in a relationship. Please make sure he knows this early on.
If you are looking to find a man you are going to spend the rest of your life with but you’re dating a slider, you’re going to be the one getting hurt.
Ask yourself if the man you are with is just into the dating scene and moving from woman to woman or whether he’s looking for the girl he doesn’t want to be without.
You’ve got to ask yourself the tough questions and face the music if you are going to figure out whether he is marriage potential.
Sure, it might sting reading this article, but the sooner you figure out where you stand, the better for YOU!
Here are a few rock-solid signs he doesn’t want to marry you.
Signs He Doesn’t Want To Marry You
Sign One: The Crazy Exes!
If a guy has been seasoned with a few serious past relationships, that’s a good thing. It means he isn’t afraid to commit to one woman for a decent amount of time. That’s definitely a good thing.
However, if he tells you that all of his exes are off the deep end, you need to consider this a warning that he might never want to marry you.
Perhaps his ex-girlfriends really were nuts, but more likely than not, they wanted something a little more serious, so he panicked and ran for the door.
You might believe you are different than all the other women he’s dated, but you aren’t.
Sign Two: Hint Overload
Most men aren’t dumb, and they understand when you drop hints about wanting to get married. The point here is you shouldn’t have to keep dropping hints.
If he wants to marry you, he will ask you. Pushing him to do it is never the right thing to do, because if you do get married, it might come back and bite you in the tush.
It’s better to be so amazing that he can’t stand the thought of you being with another man, so he gets down on his knee and pops the question. This is something you don’t control. He has to make the decision and he’s gotta want to marry you.
Sign Three: Distant Wedding Date
Maybe you convinced him to ask you to be his wife. That’s a great start, but if he keeps pushing the wedding date way off into the future, that’s a ginormous sign he really doesn’t want to have your hand in marriage.
Some men feel pressured and only ask a girl to get married so she stops bugging the crap out of him. Along the same lines, sometimes it’s the friends and family who do the pushing.
Keep your eyes wide open for this one.
Sign Four: Waiting for the Perfect Time
If your man is always making excuses as to why he hasn’t asked you to get hitched, you’ve got to consider the fact he’s not going to marry you.
Excuses get you nowhere fast, and if he’s always too stressed from work or he keeps getting into fights with his family, there’s a good chance it’s not going to happen.
If a guy really wants you, he’s not going to let any obstacle get in his way. In fact, he’s going to do everything in his power to make it the right time to marry you.
Sign Five: No Family Time
This is a very bad sign. If your boyfriend has family and you haven’t met them yet, there’s a real good chance you never will. When a guy loves a girl, he wants to show her off, and this includes to his family and friends.
There’s no doubt, if he’s planning on spending the rest of his life with you, he’s going to show you off like he would a gold medal.
On the flip side, there is the slight chance you haven’t met his family because of geographical reasons or because they are incredibly dysfunctional. However, if that’s the case, he should have already discussed this with you.
Sign Six: He Seems to Be Somewhere Else
If your man has been acting distant, like he’s going to break it off, it may be a clear signal he really does want to break up. When a guy doesn’t have the confidence or balls to talk about his true feelings with the woman he supposedly loves, he’s definitely not marriage material.
Sign Seven: He Chills Your Connection in Public
If he only sometimes holds your hand in public and introduces you to people with just your first name, this is a sad sign he isn’t confident in your relationship. When a man is planning on marrying a girl, he wants to make sure everyone knows you are both off the market.
This wishy-washy stuff doesn’t make sense when you are looking to get married. He must feel proud you two are a couple.
If he doesn’t seem proud, take this as a big hint he doesn’t want to be with you forever.
Sign Eight: You Aren’t in His Future
You have no summer holidays planned together or plans to move in together, and he doesn’t ever plan anything in advance with you. This means you are not in his future plans. Perhaps you are just the girl of the moment, as much as that might sting.
If he truly loved you, he would be setting up and including you in his plans for the future. When that isn’t the case, you are best to end it and move on before you get hurt even more.
Sign Nine: He’s Not Interested in Meeting Your Loved Ones
When a man doesn’t want to or isn’t interested in meeting and getting to know your family, he doesn’t want you long-term. Think about it for a minute. Wouldn’t you want to meet the family of the person you want to marry?
That’s a no-brainer.
This is where you need to draw the line. If he doesn’t take the initiative to show you or tell you he wants to meet your family, then you know he doesn’t want to marry you.
Sign Ten: Disinterest in Your Pleasure
This is another in-your-face sign that he doesn’t want you in his life like you want him. When a man just wants his needs taken care of in bed and he isn’t interested in making sure you orgasm too, that shows you he isn’t the guy you deserve.
If you are just a tool to pleasure him in bed, you need to drop him and move on. When a man really loves a woman, he wants to make sure he’s pleasuring her in bed beyond her wildest imagination.
Sign Eleven: Voided Social Media
If you are never mentioned in his social media posts, Facebook and Instagram, that’s a surefire way to tell you he is never going to marry you. What he is saying to the world is that you aren’t important to him and he is flying solo.
Worse yet, if he hasn’t changed his relationship status to mention you, he’s gotta be kicked to the curb pronto.
That’s not what you deserve, so if this is the case, you’ve got a decision to make.
If he cared about you, he would be flaunting you to everyone possible.
Sign Twelve: “I Love You” Flows Frequently
Some men jump the gun and very early on in the relationship, and they will tell a girl they love her—almost as if it has no meaning. Anyone can say those three words. What’s tougher is saying them and meaning it.
If he is telling you how much he loves you after the first date, you better not take it to mean anything. It takes time for love to develop and grow, and that means he’s a fake if he’s not giving it time.
Sure, you might be flattered at first, but the feeling will wear off and you will be left with wasted time. Don’t let that happen.
Sign Thirteen: He’s a Sweatbox
Some men are naturally nervous, and that’s okay. But if your guy starts sweating up a storm and can’t find his words when you bring up the topic of marriage, he’s just never going to ask for your hand in marriage.
Truth be told, he doesn’t even want to think about the possibility of marrying you. If you really want to get married and he shows you he can’t even think about it, then you need to end it and move on.
Sign Fourteen: He Can’t Make A Decision…Period
When a guy can’t even decide what pants to wear, what makes you think he’s going to be able to make the ultimate decision to marry you?
Indecisiveness is a super strong indicator that he’s never going to muster up the courage to ask you to marry him even if he wants to.
That’s very sad and very true.
Sign Fifteen: Wishy-Washy Maybe Man
If you bring up the topic of marriage and he replies with a grey “maybe,” it’s just not going to happen. Particularly if someone else asks him about it and he doesn’t give a definitive answer.
The man you deserve to be with should want to scoop you up and shout, “This girl is mine!”
Sign Sixteen: He’s an Excuse Boy
If he’s always making excuses when you start talking about marriage, he’s not going to ever ask you to walk down the aisle with him. Perhaps he wants to get a better job first or wait till after his cousin gets married next year.
It doesn’t really matter because if he is just a bag of excuses, you need to take this as a hint he will never follow through.
You deserve to be with that special man who treats you like gold, the man who wants to marry you, the guy you can’t picture your life without.
If he doesn’t want to marry you, then you need to consider the fact he might not be the boyfriend you thought he was.
Warning Flags You’ve Got a Bad Boyfriend
Warning Flag #1: He’s a Total Liar
If you have a boyfriend you always seem to catch lying, that’s a sign he’s a crappy boyfriend. When he’s never honest about his life at all, it’s time you stop taking it and tell him it’s over.
That’s just the right thing to do for you.
Warning Flag #2: He Has a Leash on You
When you’re with a guy who is controlling and doesn’t want you to do anything without being under his watchful eye, it’s likely he can’t trust himself. This shows he’s insecure and doesn’t like you hanging out with your friends.
This points to the cold hard fact he’s crappy for you.
Warning Flag #3: Illogical Expectations
When you are with a guy who insists you are loving, attentive and sweet to him and he doesn’t return the favor, he’s a creep.
Warning Flag #4: Can’t Tell You He Loves You
“I love you” is something your boyfriend should be telling you if you’ve been together for any length of time. Keep in mind he shouldn’t be saying this to you after date number two. If he is, that’s an issue.
But if you’ve been together for a few months and he still hasn’t told you he loves you, give your head a shake because he’s a bad boyfriend.
Warning Flag #5: No Balls
If your boyfriend doesn’t have the balls to stand up for you when someone else disrespects you, then he’s not the man you deserve. Even if it’s one of his friends who says something inappropriate, he should have the decency to put him in his place.
That’s just the right thing to do.
Warning Flag #6: Unbalanced Treatment
You’ve got a bad apple when he always treats you like he doesn’t need you, but you need him. This is another example of total disrespect, and you should never stand for it. Healthy relationships are all about balance and loving respect.
Warning Flag #7: Jealousy Override
When your boyfriend has extreme jealousy over you, he is showing you he can’t trust you. Yes, a small amount of jealousy is healthy, but when you cross that line, it can be downright dangerous.
If he continuously accuses you of cheating with any man you go near, that’s a solid indicator you don’t need that jerk. You deserve to be trusted.
Warning Flag #8: Not Top Priority
In a true loving relationship, he should treat you as his top priority. You shouldn’t feel like an option at all. This means he needs to first consider your wants, needs and desires and to do his best to fulfill them. Thinking about you should be a 24/7 thing for him.
Warning Flag #9: Love Me, Love Me Not
You’ve got a crappy boyfriend if he’s all lovey-dovey when you are alone behind closed doors but acts uncaring when he’s with his family or friends.
Chances are he’s buttering you up for one purpose only, and that’s to get you into the sack for some fun. Yes, sex is important in a healthy relationship, but it’s not everything. You deserve to have a guy who always shows you he loves and cares about you, regardless of the setting.
Warning Flag #10: No Quality Time Together
When your man seems to never be able to make any quality time for you, that’s a strong indicator he’s a jerk. If he’s full of excuses all the time and can’t figure out a way to find some time to spend with you, then you need to say bye and move on.
Warning Flag #11: Can’t Say Sorry
This is the worst! If your man can’t ever tell you he’s sorry, and if he never accepts responsibility for his life screw-ups, he’s not good boyfriend material.
Worse yet, if he always points the finger and puts the blame on everyone else but himself, then he’s definitely not the man you should want to be with on any level.
Warning Flag #12: Never There for You
I had a boyfriend like this. I made an effort to make sure I was always there when he needed me, but when it came to my needs, he just didn’t bother.
That’s the definition of a crappy selfish man. I remember getting ready to head off to university and needed help packing the truck up and unloading it. He stayed over and slept in while I loaded the truck, took it to school and unloaded it. The jerk came up later in MY new sports car, conveniently just after I was done. Worse yet, I let him get away with it!
Don’t make the same mistake I did. Kick him out of your life now!
Warning Flag #13: It’s His Way or the Highway
If you are with a man who always has to have it his way, never letting you get what you want, he’s a crappy boyfriend. A solid relationship is all about working together to make certain decisions together. It’s gotta be a mutual thing you work at together.
Don’t let him get away with it.
Warning Flag #14: He’s Abusive
There is no excuse for hitting a woman. If your man has threatened you or hit you when he was mad, you need to end it right now.
If he’s hit you once, he’s going to do it again, no matter how much he apologizes afterwards. This is a dangerous situation you need to get yourself out of before it escalates into something worse.
Warning Flag #15: No Hand Holding in Public
A couple should want to claim their turf in public and show affection. Holding hands is one of the sweetest ways to connect and let the people around you know you are together. If you have a boyfriend who doesn’t want to have any physical contact with you in public, you need to take this as a sign he’s a crappy boyfriend.
He should want to hold your hand and let the world know he cherishes you.
Warning Flag #16: Shuts You Up
You have a terrible boyfriend if he won’t let you talk to him about something he did that hurt you. If he shuts you up when you want to talk about how you are feeling, he’s not the guy for you.
Warning Flag #17: Flirting with Other Women
This one is just plain disrespectful. If your man isn’t afraid to flirt with other girls in front of you and message them back and forth on his phone, you need to take the signal and split. This is likely just the tip of the iceberg.
You deserve respect, and he isn’t giving you any.
Warning Flag #18: Tip-Top Secret
If your boyfriend is very secretive and you know very little about him because of this, that’s not a good sign. Chances are he hiding something from you because he knows if you knew, it just wouldn’t fly.
Get out of this fast before you are in too deep.
Warning Flag #19: Picks Your Friends
If your partner is so controlling that he tries to pick who your friends are, you need to accept the fact you are dating a creep. Nobody has the right to choose who you hang out with, especially a shitty boyfriend.
Warning Flags #20: Controls You – Freedom for Him
You have a jerk for a boyfriend if he does whatever the bleep he wants but won’t let you do anything without him or at least without his approval. That’s a dangerous man that you need out of your life.
Final Words
Relationships aren’t easy. It’s important you keep an openminded perspective when it comes to figuring out whether your boyfriend is the right guy for you. There’s no use staying in a relationship that’s unhealthy or dangerous. So, paying attention to the warning signs of a crappy boyfriend is key to your happiness, saving you further heartache.
When you are looking for that man you want to marry, make sure you consider each of these signals separately that he isn’t ready to tie the knot. Love is blind and sometimes it’s better to call it quits instead of settling and knowing you are never going to get what you want, which is that happily ever after.
Think with your head and not just with your heart.
Norma says
Thank you, I am that one girl stuck in a relationship long enough to wonder!
sabina says
Am having a hard situation right now. my boyfriend is 35 years old and i am 24. he always says he liked me very much. he still says he will marry me in the coming September. but he doesn’t treat me like before. i call him, i text him more than he does. when i ask him about this, he says its normal thing. we are cool. so please, please help me to get through with this. i don’t wanna get hurt. give me an advice. please
Haniya feroz says
Play harddd darling…. If he doesn’t text u…. U also dont text him make him feel jealous and make him realize that if he doesn’t needs u nor do u need him…. If u need any other advice u can chat with me on fb its haniya feroz with dp of a doll in purple background… Feel free to talk any time
Melanie Jackson says
He says he likes u, but u wanna marry him??? It should be he LOVES at least almost everything about u. Just not likes u.y would u want to marry someone that just LIKE U?
divine says
my relationship is three years now, He has never introduce me to any of his family or friends, because they live far away from him, what I expected of him is to at least allow me communicate with them on mobile phone call, but he refuse to call them, I suspect like he is married. that is why he does that. but he always tell me how he loves me and cares for me. am just confuse on what to do.
Evelyn Williams says
Hi there i am in the exact situation. Three years never met his family. What was your outcome and what did you do? I am thinking of leaving him. He wants to move in November. I just can not do that unless i met his family. I have two daughters. I denfintely do not want anyone to move with me so they can get ahead and than leave.
preeccy says
Please kindly forget that relationship, three years of dating is enough for that man to settle down with you, Run oh I said Run
izzel says
Hi..im 36 and have live in partner in 7 yrs..he never talks about his future plan for our family..we have son but i find unusual in him..his hardworking and responsible but i seems his a stranger to me..when we argue he oftens tells me he only stay because of our son..but he gave his salary to me..i find it hard to understand our situation..somethimes he told me he will be leaving me bt after work he will be home..what should i do?sometimes i wanted to end our relationship but i want to have a complet family for my son.i am also loved by his family and consider as a wife of there son…in the public if someone ask him if who am i?he will answer it im his wife…im so confuse with our relationship…if im going to ask him he wont answer me…hmmmmmmm
Angir says
Time to let him ho.a lot guys just want s*x and want a woman in bed .not too many of them want to settle down and just want to be in a relationship.a lot of them just just want to be in
A relationship
Teeny Huts says
Hey girl i have the similar situation, but I’m not married he’s my boyfriend, we don’t have kids. I too find it hard to understand our relationship, he will be v distant and cold, then sometimes he will be very loving. Recently, he seemed to have lost interest in me, right after sx he went to play his computer games, while I had nothing to do so I normally browse online websites. We used to have the same interest in gaming, however recently because of his behavioural change, I started losing interest in games, to the point that I almost dislike it. He doesn’t make plans that include me during his one week leave, (him going on a road trip with his friends for two days) but he say he wants to spend time with me without making any plans? When I suggested some ideas like chilling at the beach he starts to divert the topic, or complain that it’s too hot outside. I am damn confused. He shows me off to his friends, but back at home he treats me like I’m air besides asking if i want coffee in the morning. During lunch or dinner (I’m always hungry) while we are together, We only ate one meal just because he wasn’t that hungry. I want to know how to go about this, he used to talk to me and communicate more and won’t leave me while we are together. It’s like some connection has been lost.
Insidious_Sid says
It’s the spread of MGTOW. Men are telling other men the total horror stories of their happy wife and happily ever after turning into a DIVORCE MEAT GRINDER horror story. More men are okay just “hanging out” with their girlfriends and have NO INTENTION of tying the not. EVER! The MGTOW philosophy is spreading like wildfire among (smart, savvy, young) men who have their whole lives ahead of them and DO NOT have to risk complete financial and personal annihilation just because princess gets bored and wants a FRIVORCE. So yeah, next time your man is distant and avoids the marriage PROBLEM, thank your local MGTOW channel.
PS – Bring the flames… I’ll just use your salty tears to put them out. hahahaha. Get cats. ( ͡ᵔ ͜ʖ ͡ᵔ )
Amie says
Thank you so much for the advice, I am 25 and my boyfriend is 43, I love him with all of my heart, with all of my might. He also tells me he loves me, but if I ask him if he talk about his parents about us getting married he makes excuses. He even cannot give me a definite answer what year he planned to see me. We are on a long distance relationship, and we haven’t seen each other for almost a year now. I don’t know what else to think.
Sheylla Ayma prado says
Well I have two kids and this man is never to propose me I already ask .. and he told me he feels uncomfortable talking about this topic I thought he will be the man of my dreams he is really a good father but he doesn’t want anything serious because he avoid the marriage topic, but I really want to get married I dont know I was engaged before and was so romantic feel like the man take the iniciativa to be with u because loves u and he think he can not leave with out and he wants you as parnert for life but I dont know about him, we have 2 beautiful kids and he still doesn’t know what he wants No for me
Jill Rice says
if they are his babies and he won’t marry you… KICK HIM OUT !!!
Life is short.. you deserve everything…
Kaye says
Thanks for the advice. My fiancé told me that he wanted to cool off the wedding which will happens in two months because he’s not ready. He also told me that I pressured him that’s why he proposed. We are still thinking what to do if were going to push through, postponed or cancelled. Is this cold feet? Does this mean he is uncertain of the future with me? Though he mentions he still love me.
Jill Rice says
leave him.. he is not ready… Let him be for awhile… men are so dumb.. Can’t live with them or without….
Shamaine says
I have a boyfriend we have been dating for 3 years now but the problem is has to marry me.He is always complaining about his financial status saying things are not okay at the moment.He did introduced me to his family and friends,they all like me.My problem is that i don’t want to wait anymore for marriage because i am in my early 30’s.My family they think he is wasting my time and please help me what must i do.
Blessing says
I have a guy he always chats with his exes all the time telling he wants them back whenever I caught him he would say he just talks to them as normal friends he lies to me that he don’t have anything to do with them we have had issues two times and he is begging me and also asking me what he should do for peace to reign pls what should I do I don’t want him to be so close to them anymore
POOJA G says
I AM 22 YEARS OLD. ME AND BF ARE IN REALATIONSHIP SINCE LAST 5 YEARS, PROBLEM IS HE NEVER INTRODUCE ME TO HIS FAMILY WHENEVER I SPOKE WITH HIM ON MARRIEGE ISSUE HE TOLD ME WE WILL SEE IN FUTURE WE HAD A CAST ISSUES, AND ALL THING HE SAYS HIS PARENT WILL NOT ACCEPT ME BUT AT OTHER SIDE HE SAYS HE DONT WANT TO LOOSE ME AND HE LOVE HE DONT WANT TO MARRY ME BUT HE WANT A RELATIONSHIP WHIT ME.
I AM SO DAMN CONFUSED I DONT KNOWN WHAT TO DO PLEASE ADVISE ME!!!!!!!!!!
Lovely says
I have the same problem with my boyfriend I love him so much but each time we talk about marriage it’s always I’m not so sure thing so I plan to leave him and move on soon I can’t anymore no matter how much I love him and want to be with him and we always use to have a lot issues because about him not making time for me or to do anything with me so yes I’m done.
Monica M says
I spend 12 years with Vince wanting a life with him. It was all the above. I should have read this years ago. He was just not into me. Period. And to this day I still think of him. This has helped me realize that I need to forget about him. He just didn’t want to marry me.
me says
I love a boy for 7 years …and 3 years we had relationship …he always seemed me a good boy …educated …but when we start relationship, I got he had relationship with other girls before …when we was in relationship I heard someone has been see his with a girl in cinema…I got sad and decided him to leave…but he tried to keep relation…he was giving up my hand if his friends see us …he never introduced me in his family after 7 years…when he was with his family or friends he totally has forget me …he never told me he love me except one time…for my birthday he made a clip with my pictures …he always was helping me if I had a problem …he believed if I truly love him, i should leave expect for mutual loving…now, it is 21 days I left him …
arooj fatima says
i love a boy we had 7 years relation i tell him now we get married but he said this is not possible i cant take stand before his family
arooj fatima says
now what i am do he says i always with you but cant married
Gemma says
My boyfriend has been with me 3 years, he thinks he’s perfect and always right. I feel like I’ve lost myself he lives with me and my son never goes out always says he loves me but he’s become so boring and predictable. He doesn’t show much affection and is hard on my son he thinks I’m really soft and treat my son to well. He never buys or surprises me with gifts or dates and wants me to be perfect and leaves most jobs to me. He works just enough to survive and loves his video games but says my son isn’t allowed internet. He always leaves everything to me and moans because I don’t do it how he would even washing up and packing groceries but tells me he just wants to teach me to make my life easier. I have no life just seems I work and serve him… my son has loads of respect for him but none for me atm am lost have tried breaking up with him but he won’t go and has nowhere to go neither do I as I bought my house my mums dead and no friends I rang his mum to ask if he could stay with her so I could have a break but she said no he got me to have abortion cos my house is only 2 bed and he’s in debt and now I can’t sleep I stay on sofa cos he says I wake him grinding my teeth. He decorated my home so thinks it’s half his now.
Z says
Honey I’m no professional, but this guy is taking advantage of you. He’s being an a**hole and thinks he’s smart. You don’t have any friends because of him. You don’t feel worthy because of him. Tell him the money he spent on decoration only cuts his debt to you for his rent(or other expenses he’s made). You don’t need to worry about where he’ll go, u ain’t his mama! Just kick him out!!!
Sandy says
After seeing my boyfriend for 7 years he just told me last night that he’s never going to get married and if I want to I should move on. Than text me today to see if I wanted to do dinner tonight….
7 YEARS TO FINALLY TELL ME.
SaintQ says
Last year I got back together with an ex of mine whom we were never too srs with because he had a relationship that ended up with marriage. We met in 2010 somewhere somehow he got married, & so I decided to move on. Now he’s divorced (at least claims to be) & I’m now 4 months pregnant with his child but he doesn’t wanna marry me. Now that makes me confused as I have fears of him getting back together with the so called ex wife.But we argue when I bring marriage up. I’m heartbroken because im thinking of having an abortion ASAP because I don’t want to have a baby with him if he doesn’t plan on spending the rest of his life with me.Im Soo stressed because I’m already a mom . I just think abortioting and moving on is the best thing to do .