There’s no doubt that dating and relationships have always been somewhat controversial. With modern dating, it gets even more complicated because people are afraid to commit, thinking they might be missing other opportunities.
The truth…often, dating and relationships aren’t one in the same these days. When you’re in a relationship, you don’t continue dating because you are supposed to commit, and nobody wants to be alone.
So, how long should dating last, and when does dating transform into a relationship? There is no solid line here. It’s a subjective question that only you and your partner can answer. That said, let’s get started with some strong signals she wants a relationship with you but might be afraid to tell you.
Juggling the fear of missing out and the fear of being alone is a stressful circumstance. It might be obvious she really likes you, but that doesn’t mean she’s ready to take that scary step and tell you. First, you need to figure out whether she’s willing to commit to you or if she just likes you.
Signs She Wants A Relationship With You
Sign #1 – She likes to ask questions
One of the clearest signs a girl wants to be with you is when she likes to ask you lots of questions. Does she ask you lots of questions about your past? If she wasn’t curious and interested in you, she wouldn’t bother. If she didn’t want to build something with you, she probably wouldn’t pay any attention to you at all.
Her questions may seem a little casual because she might be scared. Take it step by step because, if she’s asking the questions, she’s trying to figure out if you’re a match.
Sign #2 – Her body talk
You need to pay attention to how she moves around you, her body language, and mannerisms. Sometimes, the unconscious takes over and gives you pretty strong signals when she is interested in building something special with you.
Does she lean toward you when she talks?
Is her body pointed toward or away from you?
Does she touch her hair or lip unintentionally when she’s with you?
Pay attention to what she does with her body because that can help you figure out what she really wants.
Sign#3 – She loves playing pranks on you
Growing up, I was always playing jokes on the guy I had a crush on. Some things never seem to change. Playing pranks alone isn’t a clear signal she wants a relationship with you. However, if she has unintentional physical contact with you when she’s playing a joke on you, then you can take that as a good sign she’s into you.
Sign #4 – She’s doing her best to tap into your emotions
According to studies, when a woman tries to showcase her sexuality or tries telling you stories that are aimed to make you jealous and feel bad that you two aren’t together, then she wants to commit to you.
When she tries to make you react jealously, she’s telling you she really likes you but is too afraid to own up to it. Your best route is to play according to her rules, if you want her back, of course.
Sign #5 – She opens the door to her relationship past
When she gives you her past and lets you know she’s been hurt by a guy, it’s a very good indicator she wants a real relationship. By opening up her vulnerabilities and showing you her past, she’s telling you she trusts you and believes you won’t act like her ex did.
Sign #6 – This girl lets you know she has doubts
This might sound a little weird, but her question about whether this will work out tells you she’d like to commit to you. When she talks about her worries with you, she’s proving she would love to get past her doubts and move forward with you. This one isn’t the easiest to pinpoint, so keep your eyes wide open.
Sign #7 – Her friends tease you about how she feels
When this happens, it means beyond a shadow of a doubt that she’s discussed you with her friends. What does that mean? Obviously, she likes you, or she wouldn’t have said a word.
Doing this is her way of admitting how much she likes you, but she’s doing it indirectly, so it’s not so scary. If it wasn’t scary, it wouldn’t mean anything. Think about that for a few minutes.
Sign #8 – She loves teasing you
Does this girl like to tease you? If she does, this is a telltale sign she wants to be in a relationship with you. Acting this way helps her hide the fact she’s really into you. When she teases and taunts you, it means that she wants things to get more serious. Perhaps she just doesn’t know how to take the next step.
Sign #9 – She invites you to a family function
Has she invited you to a birthday event or for Christmas dinner with her parents? You’re a winner if this is the case because this clearly indicates she is into you on much more than a casual level. She likely wants to have her family’s approval before she commits to you completely.
Sign #10 – She’s interested in meeting your friends and family
Does she want to meet your friends and family? This is telling you she wants a relationship with you but wants to make sure she fits in with your world. There’s nothing more disappointing than falling for a guy to figure out that you just don’t fit with his family and friends.
When she expresses to you that she wants to get to know your family and friends, she is telling you she wants to be in a relationship with you.
Sign #11 – She likes to discuss the future
You may have talked about the past, but when you are suddenly discussing the future, it’s golden. When she starts talking about the future, she’s trying to figure out whether you will work as a couple.
Sign #12 – Her time is spent with you
That may sound a little normal, but that couldn’t be further from the truth. I’m not talking about her picking a night after practice to hang out with you. This is about her choosing to spend her priority time with you, like Friday and Saturday night.
Stop for a minute and think. You’re not going to waste your Friday and Saturday night with someone you really don’t like.
Take this one for what it’s worth. If a girl wants to be with you and only you, she’s going to make sure her most valuable hours are spent with you, regardless of when they are.
Sign #13 – She is a little bit touchy
This is one of those signs you have to look for or you will miss it. This doesn’t mean she is all over you, kissing you head to toe. This means she likes to touch you randomly or subtly or fixes your hair when she sees it’s out of place.
So please pay attention to the small gestures. You need to understand, if she didn’t want to touch you at all, she wouldn’t.
Sign #14 – This girl is an active listener
There’s a huge difference between a girl that’s seeing you for just sex and a gal that is actually into you. What’s the difference? It’s all in the ears. If a girl likes you, she’s going to spend the time to talk with you, and she’s going to want to listen to every word you say.
A girl that really likes you is going to know where you work, what your hobbies are, the name of your siblings, simply because she cares about you as a person. On top of that, she is trying to figure out whether she fits in with your life and friends. That’s a huge stress for her that she’s trying to figure out.
Sign #15 – She’s got rid of her dating app completely
This one is a biggie. If you notice that her Plenty Of Fish is no longer on her phone, it’s a huge sign she really is into you. She’s not going to throw that open door to just anyone. If she is serious about you, that app will be ancient history, whether she wants to believe it or not.
This is the true gateway for a future lover she just doesn’t want to be without.
Sign #16 – Real eye contact
There’s no doubt that people tend to stare at people they are attracted to. This is where men are much more obvious than women. If you happen to catch her looking over at you when you aren’t expecting her to, she’s probably into you. If she’s making eye contact with you, it means she wants to be more than friends. I’m not sure how else she’s going to spell that out to you.
Signal #17 – She just happens to mention it
If she tells you straight-up, you’ve got nothing to question. This is a sign that she wants something with you. She may not be so obvious in her words, and this means you will have to pay extra special attention to what she says. Remember, this is a tough thing for her to do.
She might casually ask you about being in a relationship, or she might tell you she’s not into flings. Take this as a big indicator that she’s looking to get into something serious, hopefully, with you!
Sign #18 – She is really trying to help you
Gals are able to express their feelings for guys in so many different ways. One of them is by helping you. She might like to surprise you by cooking for you after a long day at work or going out and paying bills for you when you are sick. These are the nonverbal actions that are showing you she really does care for you.
Sign #19 – She never forgets the little things
There’s no doubt women have a zillion things going on. So, if they remember your favorite ice cream, it really does mean something. When she remembers the little things, it shows she is listening and remembers the things you like, the things that make you happy or perhaps sad. Pay attention, because it’s in the details.
Sign #20 – She isn’t shy about the serious questions
When a girl is past the straight up questions about asking about what your favorite color is or what your favorite flower is, this means she really wants to know more about you, the real you. If she starts asking you the serious questions, it’s a clear-cut signal she wants to see if the two of you are compatible and can build something amazing.
Sign #21 – She’s an open book
When a girl is opening up to you and exposing her vulnerabilities, a terrifying act, it means she really is into you. Be careful because, when she is talking about her feelings and desires, she truly believes she can trust you. Don’t screw it up, please.
Why would she do this if she didn’t think there was more to this than just friends?
We’ve all been burnt. Girls with a cautious heart have learned love the hard way. The good news is they have come out stronger.
People fall in love with a bit of guardedness. It really is scary. She’s got to put her vulnerabilities out there and see how the cards fall. A girl doesn’t develop a guarded stance overnight. This is a crazy long process of betrayal and disappointment. It is an open wound that gets stronger each time it heals from being broken open again.
It’s important that you recognize there is no way you can make your girlfriend overcome her fears and admit she wants to be in a relationship with you. No matter how badly you want to help her, she’s got to do it herself.
If she is immature, you can’t make her grow up instantly. Being scared of committing is more prevalent today than ever before. Love has changed, and this is how modern relationships look.
Danger Signals She Doesn’t Want To Be In A Relationship With You
Women are just as difficult as men when it comes to figuring out how much they want to be in a relationship with you. The world seems to think that men love the chase, however, if the girl is not giving him strong signals she wants to be with him, the guy is going to get frustrated and turn the other way.
Of course, women love the attention, the notes, dinners, and flowers, but you need to understand if she’s not giving back to you, she might just be playing you. That hurts!
Here are a few pointers that are going to help you decide whether or not she’s into you, or whether you should call it quits and take a chance with someone else.
#1 – Your genuine sense of humor
Having a funny side is a great signal as to whether or not she really likes you. If you are seriously being funny and you don’t get a smirk out of her, and she thinks you are dumb and need to stop with the one-liners, that’s a fairly strong indicator she doesn’t really want to be with you.
#2 – Excuses
If this girl is full of excuse after excuse when you reach out to her to go out on a date, you might need to give your head a few shakes. If this woman always seems to be too busy for you, then you need to accept the strong possibility that she isn’t really into you.
If she really liked you she would climb mountains just to be with you. Well, not quite, but you know what I mean.
#3 – There’s this really good friend of mine I want you to meet
Say what? Women are really weird this way. If they believe you have a soft spot for them, and they believe you are a really sweet guy, they aren’t ever going to say no to you. So, to keep them from feeling guilty about not REALLY liking you, they’re going to try hard to hook you up with a good friend.
What they are thinking is if they do this, they aren’t going to hurt you as much. Yikes!
#4 – This girl is totally happy flying solo
If a girl meets a guy she is head over heels with, she’s never going to indicate that she’s happy being single. If she’s talking about wanting to meet someone special, you need to take that straight up because she doesn’t want you to be her man.
#5 – You are such an amazing friend
It really does suck when you like a gal and she yaps on about how much of an amazing friend you are. This is saying you just aren’t the guy she’s looking to build a life with, as much as that hurts.
If she is referring to you as a friend, you need to vamoose fast.
#6 – I wish you were as attractive as all the other guys I see
This is the final nail to your coffin. When a girl is talking about all these other attractive men, without mentioning you, that’s a clear indicator that she really doesn’t want to be in a relationship with you.
If she’s doing this, you need to ignore her and move on.
#7 – Her awesome life news is news to you
When you start to be the last person to learn about the great things that are happening to a girl, that’s a pretty good sign she really doesn’t care about you. If she did, you would be the first person she calls when she gets a promotion at work or has a fight with her bestie.
#8 – She gets stone cold
When a girl isn’t into a guy, she’s not going to be open and warm with him. Why? Simply because she really doesn’t care.
If it feels like she is sitting in a cloud toward you, it’s best you shift your direction and head for the sparkly sunshine!
Final Words
It’s hard to read a woman’s mind. She may be giving you some obvious clues that she wants to be your girl. On the other hand, most of them will likely be subtle and difficult to nail down.
If she is scared to tell you she likes you, then you are going to have to take all of these factors into consideration to help coax her to get over her fear and let you in on what she’s feeling.
Follow your gut and use these pointers to help you figure out whether or not she wants to be with you.
Scotty Pulliam says
What if they are back and fourth with both things alot always hot and cold
john says
Then youre not a priority and they have mixed feelings.
AZ says
I like this girl and we often talk like hey how r u etc. So one day she told me she cant wait to get off work nd im like do u have any plans and shes like always. But said it in a similing way and shes like ill see u in a bit.
Kris Okili says
Hmmmmm this is a clear indicator that they are confused themselves. Just vamoose
Sherlock says
A girl I know since childhood she stares me all the time she makes eye contact and give a beautiful smile always turns and looks me back and being shy and nervous in front of me when we’re in public place.
Does she really love me
John says
I don’t know!!!!!
Anon59715971 says
This is like what happened to me i asked her out and she said no but wants to know me better. just take your time really like if you are talking to her most likely go in with no intentions so it doesnt hurt as much when she says no like what happened to me
Anon59715971 says
Honestly don’t go in with any intentions, the girl that i liked, she talked about me to her friends, she kept staring at me as well, but because she is shy she stared at me just with her eyes like she wouldn’t move her head up so keeping it low-key this is when i was with my friends, but when she has her friends she stares at me full on. i asked her out after 4 months and got a no but she wants to know me better which is good too. She too does the exact same, she would turn back to look and have the biggest smile whenever she sees me or even when i talk to her.
Mwewa says
She’s always willing to talk to me.. Even when she replies late, She Apologizes.. Can that be a Good Sign she wants to be with me??
BORNALONEDIEVLONE says
No none of them like you guys, sorry. Born alone, die alone! Cradle to the grave!
Garrett Brown says
A girl told me she really likes me and wants to be with me and wants everything that comes with a relationship WITH me. But, she says let’s date other people. Every time I tell her let’s just be friends, she doesn’t just wanna be friends. What in the hell…..I’ve never been more confused in my life. HELP
Somebody says
You are the safety net..because she is looking for prince charming but incase if she failed then you are still there.
Black says
I notice she does about 10 to 11 of the 21 signs that shows a girl is interested. Besides, she also told me that she’s been hurt badly before and also asked if I’ve ever dated someone before. Are these signs enough to make me conclude that she wants a relationship with me?
Emmanuel Buba says
nobody wants to be alone, so many ladies would like a shoulder to cry on for the time being before they look for greener pastures
Ethan says
What if you’re already in a relationship, but the girl doesn’t like calling you, but only through text?
WK says
If u in relationship then why would she not want to chat on phone if you have met in person. Ask her out more until she’s comfortable
Saraah says
I’ve been speaking to this girl I know for a long time. I speak to her at times late at night for hours. We speak about lots of stuff, and she has taken an interest in a series I watched and finished it in 2 days. Still, I don’t know what to do next. To be honest, I’m scared to ask her out directly. Is there a way I can do it subtly?
kojo baah says
my gal calls me too much does it means that she likes me
Sharif says
Not really
isssssa moi says
so this girl i’ve known this girl for two years now we have been on and off but never dated an currently i think we are a thing but i don’t know if she likes me or wants to commit to me we used to talk one the phone every night and she used to tell me i love you and so would i now we could go for two days without speaking shes too busy to talk on the phone or for plans one day i asked her what she wanted and she said you she will randomly hit me up saying wyd and so we would have a cute convo but then later on she posted hit my line on her story so i got mad and called her out so she got mad at me because she think i’m doing too much so then we get over it i say i love you she says it back so we don’t speak for a hour or so and then i see this cute meme of a little girl smashing a Piñata saying all my love and besitos and you so i tag her and post it in my story and she replies with a lmao and then like a few minutes later says delete it so i honestly don’t know what this girl wants anymore PLEASEEEEEE HELPPPPP MEEEEEEEE
Andre says
Its possible that she maybe playing you for emotionally support. Run Bro!
Peter Andersen says
Okay, my girlfriend wants me to wait for her until she thinks she’s been healthy in her mind and tells me i must have patience, because she wants to get away from her old memories, we’ve been togehter allmost 3 months. i have’nt seen her in two days now (i know that is’nt much) but we have spoken and text each other. She tells me she only wants me and she doesn’t want others. She even says she loves me but she avoids me, and when we have agreements, she suddenly tells me that she apparently had another deal with her girlfriends it happen 7-8 times past 3 monthes. I am really in bondage. what should I do? Should I leave her or have patience?
jason says
well have patients, then if nothing changes leave her, but first get to know her more. Help her feel confortable around you an definitly be open minded with her.
R. Cooper says
This was written perfectly. Happens to be just what I needed for more clarity in my situation. You started with what it means if she’s into you, and your segment was very thorough. The ‘if not then’ was so brief it was accurate. Thank you.
Sam says
This girl I like I confessed that I liked her. But because she’s moving she said she cannot be in a nice relationship she also said I was very sweet. After she said all of this she said once she gets a car shes wanting to hang out with me really really bad. She talked to me until midnight almost. Does this mean she likes me even though shes moving??
Collins says
Hit the button bro, she is all yours !!!
KJ says
This boy I like he broke up with his girlfriend I ain’t even know but I like him and we friends and we talk to each other he 14 I’m 13 and he broke up with his girlfriend he called her a hoe . But I don’t want to talk to him about because I think dats disrespectful and it’s nun of my business but he really nice to me and I been liking him for two years now and I told him dat I wanted d or dtf and tbh I think we gone start dating
Alex says
Hi!
So i got something i dont really know how to take it.
I have a girl that from a few months ago she started to give me some signs that she likes me.
Like she is always looking at me (staring literally), trying to to talk to me or making me to talk with her when we are around each other,always trying to make jokes with me, she is also getting really shy around me getting red chicks all this stuff.
When we talk more than 2 sentences she is always messing up her words, losing the logics of what she is sayng. But at some point i heard that she have a boyfriend (engagement) so i made my way up to her to ask about it and she told me that she have a boyfriend with a really low volume in her voice, but never mentioned something about engagement.
Last time when we talked and i did help her with something she mentioned her boyfriend but in the way where she said it like this:
“-When i need help with this thing my boyfriend didnt even tries to help me and let me do that things alone”
I can realise when a girl like me or have a crush on me most of the time but i dont know how to take this situation i`m in right now. My only explination is that her boyfriend dont treat her in the way she can fell loved anymore and somehow found me. Even tho she is acting like she doesnt love me or want something from me she alwasy give me signs, always catch looking at me all the time and try to find way to make me notice her everytime she is around to me.
What should i do in this situation?
Please. 🙂
desmond says
brother code,if she dint love him why go as far as engagement…if shes bored with him whats not to say in a matter of time shell get bored with you…bruv…think this through..with your head and not the pants….
abdullaahi says
a girl I know will always laugh at what ever I said, and also like to spend time with me and Am her teacher but she always want to help me with marking and recording issues and also will ask if there r more what does this means?
desmond says
you are a teacher and there are rules about that sort of thing,but id think she likes you and is respecting boundaries,if the rules allow,ask her out
Freeman Kumah says
If your girl friend post a guy on her display picture more than a week ,please what does it mean. And what of if she had never post your picture too on her display picture before
Jake Parker says
It depends whether or not they are good friends or even best friends
desmond says
hello,so i love this girl to heaven and back,we dated for a while and now shes telling me that she wants to slow things down and be friends…that she wants to study me,she says she still loves me and wants to see me and doesnt want anyone else..but she insists on the friend title….what do you think,its driving me crazy.
Stephen says
my girlfriend is dating another guy and she still says am the one she loves but her actions and attention is with the other guy, am confused?
A girl says
I like this guy and he likes me and this has been going on for 3 years now so today I finally gathered enough courage to ask him out first I asked him, “if I were to ask you out would you say yes?” Then he said yeah. Then I asked him if he would be comfortable dating me, and he said yes. Then I ask him out and he says “no I’m not allowed to date”! I am so confused by this!
jmck1088 says
this girl I met in a summer camp as a cit has started talking to me recently she was really open to the idea of getting close and I spent three full all nighters talking to her. and have been talking to her almost every day since. she says enjoys talking to me and when I told her I liked her she said she did too, but she wanted to get to know me more before we started anything. Does this mean she likes me like that.
Charles says
Am 59, and still not bad-looking, and just started out as a bus driver in a midwestern city. Am really attracted to another driver, who is my age, give or take 5 years. She was with another female driver, and they looked at me, and laughed. The other driver said to watch out- that I could hear them. Sat alone with her the other day, and commented how beautiful her hair always is. It’s solidly white, very thick, and has a high luster, along with thickness. She felt her hair, and said that it takes two hours to dry. A few days later, I sat with her, and she just typed on her Smartphone. So, I asked her if she’d mind if I joined my classmates sitting thirty feet away. She said she didn’t mind. No more than ten seconds later, she was standing in front of us, and one of my classmates said that she had stared at the back of my head. Then, last Saturday, she walked over to the table next to me, and told four of us that she wasn’t always fat, but the job made her so. We weren’t even talking about that subject. Am going to tell her that I’d love to see her sometime… the very next time I see her. Does she like me or not?- Charles
Mr T says
She initiates a meeting with me on her own and gives also some signs that she is interested and then doesn’t appear.
Angel says
My girl only wants to watch tv and not in our room justin get phone. I got ice cream and asked get if we could get chocolate to make a nice treat and maybe watch movies she shut me down with a no faster than I could think. I’ve been trying t go t breakfast dates after taking the kids to school, I’ve tried dinner dates when they go to families house. I’ve tried anyhjng non sexual but intimate and reach once has been rejected I some kind of way. I don’t even watch tv and I was willing to because she does she still said no. I don’t knowwhat to think rite now we have 2 kids together.
Sharif says
She keeps on beeping me
She doest call
What does it mean
Help me en she doesn’t have much words
shuan says
Hi,
I met this girl about a month ago. She would call and facetime everyday like before work, after work, while she ate, and even go to sleep on the phone with me. A lot of the times her sister would jump on the phone and talk to me too. it was like that for about 3 weeks.Now she only does it once a while and she told she didnt want to be on the phone as much. I callled twice back back on tuesday and she got upset and told me I was acting needy so I got mad bc shes the one that set the trend of calling eachother so I called again and told her to block me if she didnt like it so she did. She still has me blocked but messages and calls me on snapchat now. We were suppose to hang out lastnight but she felt sick and said maybe tomorrow (today). She did call instead and stayed on the phone till she fell asleep. I really want to see her since its been about a week but I dont want her to keep thinking Im pushy so maybe I should let her bring it up? I really like and Im just confused about what she wants now.
Confused says
What if the girl’s actions match most of the ticks for she wants a relationship with you but you were the last person to find out she is seperated from her husbandvand only found out because you asked how her husband is? She also wont talk to you about why she doesn’t live with hin any longer or if is a divorce. Yet she texts you everyday and sends long texts as late as 3 am.
Brian Handerson says
What if she does all these things, on top of flirting, being nervous, laughing at all your dumb sarcastic remarks (lol), being super excited after you talk, complimenting you, checking you out, but she also has a boyfriend that she never mentions? How does one proceed? How do you figure out what she wants? How to not get burned bad? We’re both kind of hesitant and I don’t know what to do.
Jacob Baker says
I think you just need to wait for something to happen with her and her boyfriend and when she needs a shoulder to cry on and someone to be there for her and that is where you come in.
Jason Nam says
What if my girl friend tells me she doesn’t like my hair? What if our chats are dry, but she explains to me that that is the way she chats?
Anshuman Banka says
I met this girl recently through a friend of mine and I really like this girl. She is out of town right now but we do talk on a daily basis. She texts me as soon as she gets free from her work, while other times when she is with her friends she tells me that “my friends are around but I’ll message you as soon as I’ll reach home”. I don’t know what she is trying to indirectly tell me or maybe I don’t know whether she feels the same way about me as I do about her. Can you help me understand what’s happening? I am just confused and curious to know
Jacob Baker says
What if the girl tells you about other guys who told her that they like her but she seems disgusted at that.
Anonymous says
Hello Kate!
I asked a girl I really like out on a “test relationship”. That we should enter into a fake relationship for 7 days. And after those 7 days are over, then she says if she wants to go out with me. And if she doesn’t. then I accept my fate without questions and move on.
She agreed to it.
I like her very well, but I don’t really know if things are working out great between us as they should. Yes, we talk very well, but it’s 2 days left and I am more terrified than ever.
She is amazing and I really do not want to lose her. Any words of advice?
Thank you! (Crying Emoji)
Jamie says
So I found my future wife I asked her out on a date and 2 weeks later she found out that I have a crush on her and so yes I asked her on a date and she said yes so she asked her mother about me so what dose that mean and I met some of her friends and I can’t stop thinking about Skylar but I do dream about her in the future as my future wife I know her mom and stepdad very well and they treat me and my mom and stepdad like family so I am guessing Skylar has a crush on me anythouts
Bill says
Guys – there is not a single woman out there who loves you and really wants to be with you. They are incapable of being straightforward and honest. At best, women will give positive signals that they find you worthy enough to use you. Then you have to decide if she’s worth being used. The answer to that is no.
So don’t look at, approach, talk to, flirt with, date, or marry a woman. You’re better off playing Russian Roulette. Don’t say you weren’t warned.