It’s not always easy to figure out whether or not your ex still loves you. In fact, sometimes it seems just about impossible.
When you are in love with someone, it’s seriously the most amazing feeling in the world. When you are in love, you feel like you are floating on the clouds. Too bad that more often than not, crap hits the fan in relationships, differences get exploited, and two people that were once in love, part.
Let’s look at the solid signals your ex partner still loves you.
Before you head down this path, make sure you take the time to figure out if you truly want your ex back for all the right reasons. Not because you are afraid of being alone or you just don’t want them to be with someone else.
You get what I’m saying.
31 Signs Your Ex Still Loves You
1. You’re super certain they are stalking you online
If you know that your ex is following you online, the chances are pretty good he’s still into you. Why else would he be showing you that he is watching what you are up to?
2. You’ve noticed lots of calls from a number you don’t recognize
This means your ex wants to listen to your voice but just doesn’t want you to know they are calling you. Perhaps for fear of rejection?
3. They’re talking nasty about your new partner
When an ex is jealous, it means they still love you. And when they aren’t playing nice with the new guy or gal in your life, this signals they are still into you.
4. Your ex turns nasty on you
If an ex is showing anger in any way, shape or form toward you, it means they are still thinking about you. That can be interpreted as they still love you.
5. Your ex rings you without reason
If your ex is ringing you just to chat, for no specific reason, that shouts out they totally miss you. If they want to just talk with you, they miss you. Probably means they love you too.
6. Your friends and family tell you that your ex is talking about you
This is one clever way for your ex to let you know they still love you. When they casually make sure your friends and family know that you are on their mind, this is a clear-cut sign they love you still.
7. Suddenly they confess their responsibility for all the wrongs in your relationship
Chances are they are probably trying to show you they are set to turn over a new leaf. Maybe they want you to see they have changed and put it in your brain they still want to be with you.
8. You accidentally cross paths a little too often
This might just be a sign that you both are still hanging out in the same spots. However, either one of you can change that if you like. Think about this one for a minute. You’ll figure it out.
9. Your ex likes to talk about the good times with you
When they do this, the plan is likely to try and convince you to have a change of heart. You need to think first about what you want and not focus on the fact your ex might still love you.
10. If your ex is lying about having another partner, you better take it into consideration
When an ex is talking about the new excitement in their life, they are signalling to you loud and clear that you are still on their mind, they are trying to show off to you for all the wrong reasons.
11. When you get together, they are crazy touchy-feely
This just shows you they want to still be close to you. A solid sign they are still in love with you.
12. When you are upset, your ex is the first to try and make you feel better
Not sure whether they are trying to take advantage of you in a weak moment or not, but if you see this signal, it means they are still into you. They care about you and perhaps that’s love?
13. Your ex is texting you
If you ex is texting you, it means you are still in their head and that might mean they still love you inside out. Just remember, this may not be for the right reasons. You’ve got to take action to get to the bottom of this one, if you’re going to end up with what you want.
14. They ring you about the special moments
When your ex is calling you just to talk about those special moments in your life, that’s gotta mean something. Give your head a shake please.
15. Love quotes are coming your way
If your ex is opening their heart to you, chances are pretty good they still love you. They just want you to know they are thinking about you and they still want to be with you.
16. You’re getting the drunk text messages
If your ex is drunk texting or calling you, this means they are totally still into you. They are missing you and probably still love you. Take action or don’t with this one.
17. Moving on just isn’t an option
When your ex lets you know they don’t want to move on and aren’t going to move on, this signals to you they are still in love with your company. When your ex just isn’t interested in meeting other people, they are shouting to you loud and clear you are still it.
18. They are asking the tough questions about your current love life
A curious ex is an ex that’s still in love with you. When they show a keen interest in who you are with and what you are up to, this is a not-so-subtle sign they want you back. Something to ponder if that’s what you want too.
19. Your ex has crazy extreme emotions for you
If your ex can only go extreme in the emotions department with you, this also tells you they are still in love with you. One minute they might hate you with a vengeance and the next, they could be swearing their undying love for you. Be careful here please. This is one of the stronger signals that your ex still loves you.
All you have to do is figure out whether or not you want the same.
20. Your ex isn’t willingly giving you all your stuff back
If your ex is hanging onto your personal belongings, this could signal they are still trying to hang onto you. Maybe they think you will change your mind if you see they still want your stuff?
21. They are telling you they really miss your company
This one is a no-brainer. If your ex steps into the light and tells you they miss you, it means without a doubt they are still in love with you. End of story.
22. Your ex is feeling negative emotion
Indifference is the opposite of love, not hate. When your ex is hurt, they are going to say mean things. They are blaming their hurt and emotional mess on you.
Nobody plans on investing their emotions into someone only to have it not work out. But it does happen and you’ve got to deal with it.
What you should do is give your ex a little space when the negative crap is flying. You only control your feelings and actions, not theirs. In time, they will get past this and what you need to understand is, they are doing this because they love and miss you.
23. Competition is in the house
If your ex is trying to make you jealous by making sure you know they are having fun with another, you know they are still into you. They might go overboard with the flirting when you can see, and another trick is to make sure you see them out and about via social media, having fun without you.
When your ex does this, it means they are still thinking about you. Whether they are still in love with you or not is another story.
24. Push-pull in full force
When your ex is freakishly cold one minute and super hot the next, this means you are in their brain and what you do with that is totally up to you. They might push you away and then suddenly want to spend time with you just because.
Truth be told, this is very confusing.
They might suddenly stop replying to your text messages and then suddenly start calling you like there’s no tomorrow.
What you need to do is stay cool and don’t let their craziness get to you. Please don’t reward their cold behaviour by giving them your undivided attention.
25. Tracking you down during the no contract rule
This one is a rock solid signal that your ex still loves you. When they are making contact with you during your “no contact” time, they definitely still love you.
Make sure you don’t pick up the phone or respond to them at all. Prove to yourself and to them that you don’t need them to control you emotionally. Yes, it’s hard but in the end you will be better for it.
When you show them you aren’t a needy person, they are going to realize you are so much more to them. They are already missing you and for certain they still love you.
26. Pay attention as to whether or not your ex seems to always be around you
If your ex seems to always be around you, chances are they are still head over heels for you.
If they happen to always show up wherever you are, just by coincidence of course, they are obviously still thinking about you. If he or she is totally going out of their way to make sure they can converse with you, then you better accept the fact they are still into you.
27. Are they still staying in touch with you on numerous levels?
If your ex is still contacting you on a regular basis via email, phone calls, text message or in person, then you are still in their brain. Pay attention and be wary please. You want this to happen for the right reasons.
28. Pay attention to their reaction when they see you
Does your ex light up when they see you? Are they still trying to sneak glances at you when you are in the same room? If they are still totally looking at you any chance they can get, you can be rest assured they still love you.
29. Figure out whether or not your ex is still in communication with your family
When two people split for good, they make certain they cut as many emotional ties as possible. That said, if your ex is still talking or texting with your family, this means they still have a heart for you.
If they didn’t really care, they would toss your family to the wind.
30. Open your ears to what your friends are saying
Listen to what your friends are saying. If they are constantly talking about how your ex is asking about you and wondering what you are up to, you can translate that into your ex wanting you back.
Again, if they didn’t care about you, they definitely wouldn’t inquire or ask.
31. Is your ex totally pissed after your breakup?
If your ex is carrying their anger towards you long after your split, they definitely still have the hots for you. If they are looking out for you, their actions are screaming out loud that they can’t get you out of their mind.
This means they still love you.
You’ve Got To Figure Out What To Do…
Take the time to figure out what went haywire
Your ex may have given you a totally lame excuse as to why your relationship isn’t working. It really doesn’t matter because if you want it to work, you have to determine what went wrong in the first place.
If you aren’t will to go in and dig deep to fix the problem or issues, then it will never work no matter how much your ex still loves you.
Cease your panic mode
No matter what, you should chill for at least a couple months before you even entertain the thought of getting back together with your ex. If you believe you just can’t live without your ex, then you’ve got a heck of a lot of work to do on you.
Don’t panic please. That just makes you look crazy desperate and that is a total turnoff.
Figure out who you were and get back to that.
Envision yourself moving on and becoming stronger, happier. You can be all you want to be and you do not need your ex to do that. Understand that and the magic will start happening.
Find your past life before you decide to go back to your ex
Commit to getting some exercise so you can release stress and feel good about yourself. This will help you appreciate you and the life you have. Self-confidence is essential in any healthy relationship and you need to make sure you have it before you think of accepting your ex back, because they love you.
Understand you are important and you should make every effort you can to make sure you look your best. Go get a new haircut and get your nails done. Just figure our what you can do for you to make yourself smile and you are ahead of the crowd.
So What Should You Do If You Clearly Want To Reunite:
This is a tough one but why not mail him an old-fashioned letter?
Sometimes we get so caught up in our crazy world of technology that a snail mail letter is the key to special. Exactly what you need to show your ex, you are super serious about getting back together.
On that note, if it was you that screwed up the relationship ,you need to open up and apologize. Make sure you are specific about your plans to change.
Understand it may take a little time for them to respond
This is totally normal. If your ex gives you a pleasant response, the ball’s in your court for the next move. If on the other hand, they don’t give you a reply, you need to understand it’s time for you to move on far and fast.
This will sting but it’s the right thing to do.
Try asking your ex out for a beverage
You seriously want to keep it low-key. Make sure you catch up first before you get into anything more serious. What you are clearly trying to do is figure out whether you’ve still got that essential emotional chemistry you need to make it work.
If it’s not there, you need to walk away. If it’s still there, well, that’s a whole different story.
Hook up and talk about what went wrong
This one is a heck of a lot easier said than done. You need to tell your ex the truth here when you are discussing what went wrong. If you were wrong, say you’re sorry and you want to do better.
If you want any relationship to work, you must have amazing communication. Need I say more?
Steer clear of living your old relationship
This is a really bad move. Don’t ever try to create what you once had. It’s broken and gone. You might have a chance if you agree to make new. Build something stronger and better with what you have learned about each other.
You can, if you want.
It’s your choice.
How Should You Handle It If Your Ex Wants You But You Aren’t Interested:
Be clear
You are a sneaky loser if you let your ex think you want them back when you really don’t. That’s just plain cruel. If you don’t want them, make sure you tell them.
How about some revenge?
The best route to do this is to cut them loose and make sure you make yourself more beautiful than ever. This means dressing to drop dead status, getting your nails and hair done, and don’t be afraid to hit the gym and get buff.
When you are looking and feeling fantastic, you’re going to make your ex cry.
Take control of your resolve
It’s natural to feel a little jealousy when your ex gets a new fling. What you need to do is forget all that and focus on yourself. Bottom line is, you deserve.
Understand reality
You might want to hook up with your ex but any healthy relationship is a two way street. If they don’t want to give you their heart and soul, you need to kick them to the curb no matter how much it hurts.
You deserve exactly what you want. When you accept this, you will have everything.
Final Words
When you are looking for signs your ex still loves you, it’s sort of like a crapshoot. In other words, dammed if you do and dammed if you don’t!
Pay attention to the clues in front of you and use these expert tips, pinky swear promise you will figure it out.
Best of luck!
Norm says
This is sound advice but very generalized. More and more people are finding themselves single at an older age and dating / break ups are more nuanced. The situation I find myself in is almost surreal. I am a single father, when my ex and I became serious my son was just 1 years old. We were a good team for almost 4 years. I adored her, my son adored her and her family. A few months after we got engaged she told me, I went out with an ex I dated only for a “minute” I have feelings for him. I asked her for details and she said ” You’re just a guy I met on the internet”. I tried to talk to her, but she acted like I was a stalker, a total stranger, blocked me with no explanation. I moved on but recently I hired a mutual contact to update my business network and social media for my company and did a bulk email. She was on it and now I am blocked from a networking site? I never actually contacted..? Guys go too far.. stalking is legit but its like I’m being labeled as an attack t0 be cruel? Is there a way to stop this?
mike lees says
hi kate how are u are u single hw old ae u where are u from i am 42 and single i live in belleville ont canada but i am from toronto ont canada
Jessica says
Hi am Jessica
From Houston Texas
Jessica says
Here is my email address you can text me on hangout
Tolis says
Hi jess where do u live?
Criz Andrea A. Payad says
Im from Philippines, 28 years old. My boyfriend is from Saudi Arabia, 44 years old.
We had a huge fight last sunday because I caught him attended a Filipino gathering without me knowing it or should I say he really didn’t want me to know. We lived together for a year in Saudi when I was still there, I came to Philippines last May 2017, our relationship was on and off coz of trust issue. He visited Philippines this year, March, he met my family and on his 6th day here, I caught him from his mobile that he cheated on me last year (August) he had this affair with another filipina and he admitted it, he said he paid for this woman’s services and he said he honestly didn’t like it. But based on the messages he sent her, I dont know of im going to believe him. That issue is already finished, he begged for my forgiveness and promised me he will never do that again. Until last sunday, I saw photos from a facebook friend and I was surprised to saw him on that party. He’s always telling me that he’s busy but he didn’t even bother to tell me he’s attending that Filipino gathering coz he already knows what’s gonna be my reaction, and he also reason out that to me, that I would have gone crazy again if he tells me. I got mad, and he didn’t talk to me the whole day. He calls me after that, saying he need a break. That I will never change. That I dont have the rights to control him whether he wants to go out with his guy friends and also girls. He also told me to wake up, that maybe one day something might happen, that he might get married again (coz he’s divorced from last year)
And all he wants to happen is for me to have a career that’s why he bought my own working visa in Bahrain which is only 30minutes drive from his place in Saudi. I begged for him not to leave me but he said he couldn’t answer it now. I asked him if he still loves me, he said yes. Now I dont know what to do. Should I cut contacts with him or what. He just called me last night, but just to ask how are my kids and parents doing. It was only 2 minutes call. Now, I put both my mobiles to airplane mode.
Please help me to get him back.
Zaki says
You’re giving him a hall pass without you even realizing it. You mentioned he cheated on you twice and you still forgave him, he is gonna repeat it and won’t take you seriously. Walk away for awhile, at least 2 or 3 weeks. Don’t reply to his messages, show him that you are stronger and show him that you see through his bullshit. Trust me on this, i went through the exact same thing you are going through. You deserve someone better.
Just saying says
No you don’t want him back! He is abusing you. He does not love you if he is cheating on you and busy looking out for himself. He sounds like a narcissist who is out to destroy you. Run the opposite way and love yourself until you find someone who will love you as much as you do. Have self respect, find hobbies you enjoy and meet new people who will be your tribe. Join a support group with people who have been through this. There you will find your tribe. Love them hard
Just a girl says
Hey Kate, Great article.
Thank you for sharing your insight. 🙏🏻✌🏻💗🙂
Tina says
Hi , my ex boyfriend was taking me for granted and mistreating me and he is the one who broke up with me and since i told him that i wont be able to forgive him anymore and i have tried a lot to make this relationship to work and i will not going to do anything further and i did no contact for almost 5 weeks in which he did not reach out to me he was just viewing my stories and not all of them …. i was having a bad day and wrote a status on facebook and he texted me saying whats wrong i tried not to answer him back so sent that he just got worried and all so i told him ot to worry and its nothing , the day after he texted again to check on me , i really want him back but he hurt me so much, how to deal with him???
Me says
If his name is Jacob… take him back. His love is unconditional. It just takes time to let it show.
michelle says
I have the same problem with my ex
Kevin says
This is so scary but what a great article I’m not surprised of these signs I’m just surprised on how many of these hit right on this does not make me want to go back to her all I want for them is to be happy and they are 🙂
W says
I left her. She was detached, not available etc. Thats why i broke but lately i saw that that she is giving me signs without any contact. And at this point im not sure if she is missing me or is she being hurt or if she cant move on. I would be glad if she moved on. I dont want for her to be sad then im sad. If she wants a second chance im willing to let her have that chance. I didnt close all doors. But i cant stand that she is sad and not willing to reach out no matte what is the outcome. My sadness i can manage in a different way. Im very empatic. I cant reach out to her because i didnt do nothing wrong. She had it all from me. Im trying to move on as well buti want her to be happy. I dont bother if she finds another guy then i can be calm. But somehow i dont think she knows what to do. She is trying to reach me by sending me some signals which is not a direct contact. Maybe she is testing the grounds if im mad or if i can forgive. Yes i can forgive. Im sure this will last further on about status quo before she make a move either way. For me it would be easier if she could move on first. I would be happy for her. If she comes back i would also be happy but she cant just be there thinking and sending me signals. Rejection in this situation silence will make her even sadder and i dont want that.
X says
Hey W,
If you still love her, maybe you should also make a move towards her. Because for some ppl, its just difficult to make move, or if you keep pushing her aways, then it will be more difficult for her … to have confident and courage to reach you out.
Sarah says
I broke up with my ex last year in May and we have been not talking for 7 months, the reason why we broke up is that I caught him cheating on me, he told me he doesn’t love me but after a week he told me he loves me but to my surprise he continued cheating on me and I broke up with him.He used to follow me on Facebook but we used not to chat. Recently, last week he told me that he wants us to get back together, and I don’t know what to do.
Bre says
My take on advice i’d say before you say yes i recommend to rebuild your friendship first, & learn to trust each other again. One other thing I would recommend is to see how he treats you when you guys hang out. Hope this helps. 💙
pascal says
I have a girl we have dated for 2years and I promised to marry her but since her brother in love came to know my interest over, they encouraged her to cut me off, which she did and block me from all social network.. she became furious with me each time we see but since she knows the over my love for her that she began to be mild.. Now how do I get my ex girl back I still love her and wants to marry her she gives me signal but it seems my best efforts isn’t enough to make her come back pls advice me ..thanks
Shasa says
He left me I beg him but he never listen to me and I know very well that he is still I love with me but can’t tell me because of his ego and stubborn and I’m still in love with him too please what should I do to get him back
Danial says
Well, if he left you he had a reason. Maybe the reason is something you can fix and you want to fix. For me it was my anger but I was too busy being angry to listen when she told me it was hurting her. By the time I actually started to listen and do something about it she had already given up on me. So you saying he is stubborn and his ego is in the way might not be correct. He might have had a real reason keeping him away. My 9 year relationship spent an entire year apart with her waiting for me fix it and another 6 months of her accepting I wasn’t. The person I am right now after working on the anger would beat the guy that lost her into a coma for the way he spoke to her. Even now she still loves me but the damage and refusal to acknowledge and change made the love too hurtful.
Danial says
Yeah, so I basically screwed up my relationship and blamed them for it ending and a year and half after the break up we are both in love with each other I got over the issue’s but she is still very mad at me and I literally did the opposite of every piece of advice her and she started seeing someone else but is clearly still angry at me. I feel like that means she still loves me, you can’t be angry and not care anymore, right? I have to let it go though because I drove her into the arms of another man and if I try now I look pitiful and jealous. So listen to this advice in this article because doing the opposite for sure doesn’t work.
Dolly says
Am 41 years old, my boy friend is just 33 years old. He loves me but he doesn’t want his friends and family to know because of fearing their reaction on age gap. I love him so much
Recently he has reduced his meeting me, it’s affecting me. I feel am loosing my mind. I want to let him go because I have never been in a secret relationship, but whenever I try to forget about him I feel am loosing my mind.
What can I do?
Nelali Margarete says
ok i hve this ex whom i still love very much but i dnt knw how to get him back.according to him,i messed up because i pranked him about being pregnant,which he didnt take very well.but before the prank,he was one hell of a complicated guy that i could hardly tell what was going with him.he loved me which i felt it but his actions were completely different.he would hardly reach out via text or even call.i felt disturbed n angry when i will leave him a text online and he comes and views it but replies after hours.that was hurting.i complaint aften and he continuesly promised for an improvement but just kept going worst day by day.he is nt financially stable because he is still studying and he needed money so he always crumpy which i didnt know how to handle.he would always demand for space..he would always come online but hardly reach out to me.he made me feel soooo insecured so i decided to talk to a friend and she brought upthe idea of the prank.so when i did the prank and told him i was pregnant,he didnt even call to reach out or reply my texts.after 3days,i wrote him and asked him if he didnt see my messages he said he did then i told him it was a prank.he never replied again.and when i called him to apologise and fix things up,he told me no.that it was over between us because i played a game on him.but i reminded him of all the times i forgave him but he seem not to care and pleaded for me to stay away because he had moved on.he moved on within a week that is what got me wondering.he didnt evn give me a second chances claiming he doesnt like lies.he said if it was cheating,he would have handled it not me lyx to him.so to me,i just felt like he was just looking furth for de slightest mistake to break up with me because there were slso times he lied but i shifted them aside because i prioritised the relationship more than the lies.so i dont know what to do.we are not in the same town anymore
C says
so my ex and i still love and care for each other but she don’t want to get into an relationship with me again what should i do?or say to her?
Lisa says
I’m in the same boat, have you gotten any advice?
Kim says
Nothing. Let her go.
Pipz says
I met a guy on fb messenger. He initiated the conversation. We ended up in a relationship. He told me he is still married after 2 months. I didn’t know beforehand. His wife is in another relationship already. I was insecure… Jealous…nasty towards him… Plain miserable… I pushed him away. He didn’t dump me on what’s app or over a phone call. He just changed his relationship status on fb. To my horror I saw that. Afterwards he was constantly on fb messenger after he told me he needs to calm down and Think because he is tired. But he wasn’t too tired to spend hours on fb messenger? I made a fool out of myself. I called him… What sapped him… Fb messengers… You tube messages…he responded after 6 hours that I should stop and that he will talk to me the next day. I’m broken. Does anyone have any advice please? Should I distance myself and wait it out? I feel like a total lovesick pup. I am at wits end
Dennis says
😂 grass is greener on the other side. And once they get there. they fine fire ants and crabgrass. you can never satisfy any woman in all country. all Goodguys eventually get divorced. all the good guys have one thing in common. Their ex wants them back. good guys are human too. Divorce is a powerful weapon. every woman’s got it made at the courthouse. it’s an unforgiving violent Act. it’s no different than taking a knife and stabbed them rib cage. We move on they never do. they go from getting treated everywhere they go.To a guy that drinks $40 worth of drinks. You drink $10 worth. Then he asks you for $35. To split the bill. women over 40 pay their own way. Plus half the dates. It’s no wonder why they’re angry. I never wanted a divorce. I was completely content. I’m 52 I have the body of a 28 year old athlete. 33 year old girl swept me off my feet. I’m wise now. I treat her like s*** and she loves it. I’d rather die than go back with my ex. No more mr. Nice guy😂😂😂
x says
me and my gf dated for a very short time and i still like her and i think she still likes me to. she said she was not ready to date me but i want her back but i dont have the ego to tell her so plzzzzzzzz someone help me i love her
just coment under this to help
coraline says
I still like him but he thot I didn’t like him but, I did a lot and it just got my dupereshen worse
Karissa says
I was impressed of what i’ve read because some of the details happens to just recently…thanks for the tips that your share it helps me a lot